tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-88344121649836498502024-03-07T23:03:34.381-08:00Channel Cluttermusic/tv/filmChannel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-60601712295146324342015-01-11T02:17:00.001-08:002015-01-11T02:17:53.494-08:00<b><span style="font-size: large;">2014 Movie List</span></b><br />
Slightly later than usual, here is the full list of movies I saw in 2014 - In the order I saw them, duplicates removed and with marks out of 10. Top 20 (and bottom 10) to follow...work permitting!<br />
<br />
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="border-collapse: collapse; width: 490px;">
<colgroup><col style="mso-width-alt: 14848; mso-width-source: userset; width: 305pt;" width="406"></col>
<col style="mso-width-alt: 3072; mso-width-source: userset; width: 63pt;" width="84"></col>
</colgroup><tbody>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="height: 15.0pt; width: 305pt;" width="406">American
Hustle</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; width: 63pt;" width="84">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Mandela: Long
Walk To Freedom</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Secret
Life Of Walter Mitty</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Paranormal
Activity: The Marked Ones</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">12 Years A
Slave</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Wolf Of
Wall Street</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Railway
Man</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">20 Feet From
Stardom</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">August: Osage
County</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Book
Thief </td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">4</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Dallas Buyers
Club</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Jack Ryan:
Shadow Recruit</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Invisible
Woman</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Robocop (2014)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Monuments
Men</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">4</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Her</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Inside Llewyn
Davis</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Stranger By
The Lake</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Non-Stop</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Lego Movie</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Grand
Budapest Hotel</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Under The Skin</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Labor Day</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Captain
America: The Winter Soldier (3D)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Divergent
(European Premiere)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Starred Up</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Raid 2</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Double</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Calvary</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Locke</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">We Are The
Best</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Tracks</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Amazing
Spider-Man 2 </td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Pompeii (3D)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Godzilla (3D
IMAX)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Gladiator
(Live In Concert - Royal Albert Hall)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">X-Men: Days Of
Future Past</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Edge Of
Tomorrow (3D IMAX)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Oculus</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Maleficent</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Fault In
Our Stars</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Anomaly</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">3</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Belle</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Tranformers:
Age Of Extinction (3D)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Soul Boys Of
The Western World : Spandau Ballet Documentary</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Begin Again</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Dawn Of The
Planet Of The Apes</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">How To Train
Your Dragon (3D)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Boyhood</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">I Am Divine</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Guardians Of
The Galaxy (3D)</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Hercules</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The
Inbetweeners 2</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Pride</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Into The Storm</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Lucy</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">God Help The
Girl</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Keeper Of
Lost Causes</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">As Above, So
Below</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">What If</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Obvious Child</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Before I Go To
Sleep</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Guest</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Maps To The
Stars</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Riot Club</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Gone Girl</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Magic In The
Moonlight</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Maze
Runner</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl68" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">71</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Fury</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Babadook</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Nightcrawler</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Interstella</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Mr Turner</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">7.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Hunger
Games: Mockingjay Pt.1</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">8.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">The Imitation
Game</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6.5</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Exodus : Gods
and Kings</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">6</td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl64" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;">Birdman</td>
<td class="xl67" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;">9</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-58957600007210204912014-09-22T07:45:00.000-07:002017-09-08T00:30:38.330-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">SEVEN MOMENTS OF PLEASURE; A WEEK OF KATE
BUSH MEMORIES – </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><i>ORIGINALLY POSTED ON FACEBOOK BETWEEN
03/09/14 & 10/09/14</i></span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
In one week’s
time I will have seen Kate Bush live for the first time – now there’s a
statement I never thought I’d ever get the chance to say - and to mark the
occasion I thought I’d try, in the run up to ‘Before The Dawn’, to write and
post something every day about how much Kate, and her music, has meant to me
over the years. Welcome to my Seven Moments of Pleasure...</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b>Moment One: A Strange Phenomenon –
originally posted 3<sup>rd</sup> September 2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
In February
1978, when Kate Bush’s ‘Wuthering Heights’ first entered the UK Singles Chart,
I was completely and utterly oblivious to her charms. I was a 12 year-old ‘Star
Wars’ fanatic, with virtually no interest in music at all – it would be several
months before I bought my first 7” single, ‘Night Fever’ by The Bee Gees, and
it would be quite a few more before I formed any opinion about Kate Bush, her
music or the “wily, windy moors” she found herself rolling and falling on. I
remember Faith Brown’s impressions of Kate and Pamela Stephenson’s, ‘Oh,
England My Leotard’, more vividly than the real thing. It was another year
before I owned any albums – I was given my first two long-players as Christmas
presents in 1979 - and If I’m honest, I was so completely wrapped up in those
first two LP’s, Blondie’s ‘Parallel Lines’ and Dollar’s ‘Shooting Stars’, I
barely noticed anything else was happening in the world of music. So transfixed
was I by the fact you could clearly see Thereza Bazar’s nipples through her
cheese-cloth blouse on the inner sleeve, even Gered Mankowitz’s infamous Kate
photos could not distract me! By the time Kate had moved on to albums No.2 and
3, I was virtually a militant in my rejection of any guitars on the records I
listened to and bought. I had noted with interest The Human League’s ‘Dare’
inner-sleeve defiantly listed every type of synthesizer used on the album, and
gave Philip Adrian Wright’s contribution credit as ‘slides & occasional
synthesizer’ - now this was the type of band I could really get behind.
Obviously I refused to acknowledge the fact that Duran Duran’s output was
literally riddled with Chic-inspired guitar licks and Ultravox, fronted by
guitarist Midge Ure, were using guitar riffs front-and-centre on most of their
best singles.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Kate finally
started to sneak into my life via my older brother’s female friends. One
virtually stole her entire look from Kate’s crimped-haired, gypsy/hippy vibe,
while another visited several times, brandishing the ‘Never For Ever’ album,
and I was completely fascinated by the artwork before I had even heard the
music contained inside. But it was one of my own school friends, Annie, who
finally helped me fully realise ‘the pull of the Bush’.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Annie was my
unlikely ‘heavy metal’ friend – everyone had one back then – and she owned a
clear vinyl copy of ‘The Kick Inside’. During one of our endless evenings,
barricaded in her bedroom, with bottomless coffee and biscuits, reading
extracts from her (quite scandalous) diary and just laughing like I’d never
laughed before or since, she informed me, ‘You HAVE to listen to this.’ She
played me ‘Wuthering Heights’. A few years on from its release, it sounded more
magical than I remembered, unlike anything else and better than ever. We played
it again. We discovered that when her record player was set to repeatedly play
7” singles, it automatically landed at the beginning of ‘Wuthering Heights’ on
the LP. We let it play over and over, every fade was followed by the mechanical
clicks and clunks of the automatic replay, leading into THAT exquisite piano
intro. Kate had finally entered my life in an evening long continuous loop, two
years and three albums into her career...</div>
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<b>Moment Two: Coming In With The Golden Light</b>
- <b>originally posted 4<sup>th</sup> September
2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b><br /></b></div>
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The first
Kate Bush album I owned was ‘The Dreaming’. I picked up a copy with no cover –
just the inner-sleeve – for 50p from the record department of the Edinburgh Princes
Street branch of Boots the Chemist where I worked at weekends and during school
holidays. Self-produced and almost wilfully obtuse, it would prove to be Kate’s
least commercially successful album, but one which is cited by many as her
‘lost masterpiece’. For me it would be the perfect introduction to Kate and my
gateway to accepting her as a true artist. Almost completely eschewing
traditional song structures, instead she was now creating fascinating
soundscapes and populating them with intriguing characters and extraordinary
stories. Her experiments with the Fairlight sampler meant she was no longer
limited to her previous basic palette of instrumentation – instead of guitars,
bass and drums - in Kate’s limitless new world, her voice could be transformed
into the braying of a mule on ‘Get Out Of My House’, a breathe sound formed the
backdrop for a lone choir-boy solo during ‘All The Love’ and human grunts
filled ‘Sat In Your Lap’ with an unstoppable percussive energy. A million miles
away from the relative simplicity of ‘The Man With The Child In His Eyes’,
accepting and loving ‘The Dreaming’ meant there was virtually nothing Kate
could throw at me in the future which would be quite as challenging – well,
there was a certain washing machine, but we’ll get to that later.<b><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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Kate was now
well and truly on my radar. In 1983, Jimmy Savile’s ‘Old Record Club’ was still
going strong in a Sunday afternoon slot on Radio 1– yes, he did have a career
as a DJ before he switched professions to ‘National Disgrace’ – and in one
particular episode he was looking back to October 1980. Hearing ‘Army Dreamers’
again for the first time in a couple of years, it was like listening to a
completely different record - that insanely complex backing vocal arrangement,
the gun mechanism as percussion, the drill sergeant screaming under the chorus
– suddenly I saw a link backwards from my beloved ‘The Dreaming’. My brother
had a few older Kate singles. I dug them out, but his collection was far from
complete. For the time being I was resigned to playing these few precious gems
time and time again.<o:p></o:p></div>
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1984 was my
final year at high school. I was preparing to attend the Edinburgh College of
Art after the summer and my friend Annie gave me the most perfect
‘end-of-school’ / 18th Birthday gift; she bought me a copy of Kate’s ‘The
Single File’. A complete collection of her 7” singles to date, from ‘Wuthering
Heights’ to ‘There Goes A Tenner’, with an exclusive bonus 7” and all housed in
an ivy covered, flip-top box. I was soon obsessed, playing every single – A’s
and B’s – until I should have been sick of them – but here’s the thing – I
NEVER WAS! Obviously, I still own the box – photo attached – and even kept it
up to date with subsequent releases from ‘Hounds of Love’ onwards. I was now
ready to travel back in time and re-discover the 1970’s Kate Bush albums...</div>
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<b>Moment Three: Thunder In Our Hearts -</b> <b>originally posted 5<sup>th</sup> September
2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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My
re-introduction to the previously ignored delights of Kate Bush’s
back-catalogue coincided with my first steps into a much bigger world. I had
earned a place at the Edinburgh School of Art in the summer of 1984 and the
first year proved to be exhilarating and terrifying in equal measure. The
foundation year was structured to give each student a glimpse into the workings
of every department – from ‘fine art’ subjects like drawing, painting and
sculpture to more design and craft-type skills such as graphic design,
illustration, fashion design and photography. It was a fairly intense
environment, but if there was one thing art students are really good at, it’s
drinking, socialising and throwing a party! Over the course of that year I
became particularly close to one girl, Tracey, and we have been great friends
ever since. She had gone to school in an area not far from my parent’s home and
we bonded over our shared love of music. My first memories included a
spontaneous dance-along to Bronski Beat’s ‘Smalltown Boy’ inside the lift as it
descended from the top floor of the college building to the ground-floor
canteen and a pair of ‘Propaganda Trousers’ which would have out-sold the
‘Frankie Says’ t-shirts if we’d only had the sense to go into mass production.
With our primary subjects chosen – Illustration and Animation for me, Drawing
and Painting for Tracey, we moved into our second year. Having both spent our
first year at home, we decided to fully embrace the college experience and get
a flat share together. We recruited a third flatmate, Sarah, and found a place
in the Viewforth area of Edinburgh’s city centre. Tracey and I moved in four
weeks earlier than Sarah, so we had the whole flat to ourselves for the month
of August. Aside from several evenings spent recreating the hits of the day
with a tape recorder, a copy of ‘Smash Hits’ and an empty tape box as
percussion, we would talk endlessly about music and our favourite artists,
playing selections from my (already) vast singles collection. At the time we
disagreed fiercely about her love of Fleetwood Mac, but we were on exactly the
same page when it came to Kate. So, it was with much excitement we awaited the
release of Kate’s newly announced new album, ‘The Hounds of Love’, and its
introductory single, ‘Running Up That Hill’. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Although
Tracey and I were spending a lot of our first month away from home together, I
don’t remember us spending a lot of time watching TV. Aside from the Moldavian
Wedding Massacre on ‘Dynasty’ – which BTW caused a rather serious hair
bleaching emergency – the only other thing I vividly remember us watching
together was on 5th August 1985 - Kate’s appearance on ‘Wogan’ to launch the
‘Running Up That Hill’ single.<o:p></o:p></div>
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While it may
not have the surreal quality of her performance of ‘There Goes A Tenner’ on
‘Razzmatazz’ in 1981, where Kate lip-synched the song surrounded by a
studio-full of slack-jawed teenagers, virtually mouthing, “What the f*ck!”, I
think this television appearance, more than any other, sums up what I love most
about Kate Bush. Theatrical, highly entertaining and, more or less, completely
loopy!<o:p></o:p></div>
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The
performance opened with Kate, flanked by six musicians (including Del Palmer
and her brother Paddy) and two flag bearers, dressed in a floor-length brown
coat, ‘preaching’ the lyrics from behind a lectern. There is nothing flashy
about the costumes or the staging; nothing is going to get in the way of the song’s
lyrics. As the song builds, and the musicians inch forward, Kate produces a
full size bow. Pulling an arrow from behind her brother’s back, she crouches
into position to fire the arrow, a pose which perfectly recreates the image
featured on the single’s picture sleeve artwork. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Somehow over
the top and understated at the same time, it puts the recent
‘do-I-sing-here-are these-the-right-dance-moves’ shambles by The Saturdays,
appearing on the National Lottery programme to promote their new single, into
context! Completely mesmerizing, it acted as a stunning introduction to Kate’s
next chapter...</div>
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<b>Moment Four: Take Me Deeper And Deeper -</b>
<b>originally posted 5<sup>th</sup> September
2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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Kate’s
‘Hounds of Love’ has been my undisputed favourite album for nearly 30 years. It
is easily my most played piece of music and the one I’ve extracted the most
pleasure from over the years. Since its release in 1985, nothing has come close
to taking its place. Aside from containing four of her best singles, all lifted
from the five-track, side one of the album – a hit to filler rate that rivals
Michael Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ – it also features the extraordinary song-cycle,
‘The Ninth Wave’, a continuous narrative told across seven songs, which must
stand as one of, if not THE, outstanding achievement of Kate’s career.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Having been
slightly too young to fully embrace the excesses of prog rock and the ‘concept
album’ boom of the 1970’s, and subsequently choosing to shun most guitar based
music from my record collection, I had limited exposure to the notion of a collection
of linked songs forming a cohesive story – not something that was high on the
agenda for the likes of Depeche Mode or The Human League – but ‘The Ninth Wave’
completely blew me away. With all the state-of-the-art facilities of her newly
built home-studio at her disposal Kate was exploring cutting edge sound design
and layering the songs with some of her most raw, emotional lyrical content.
The seven inter-connecting tracks which make up ‘The Ninth Wave’ tell the story
of a woman lost as sea, slipping between consciousness and a fantasy filled
dream-state, facing her own death and clinging to the memory of the loved ones
she’s left behind. As a set of songs they are equally challenging, soothing and
profoundly heartbreaking. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I spent
months, and then years, trying to visualise the story in my head. I fantasised
about turning the songs into a film, or animation during my college years and
then for the next couple of decades have drifted back and forward into that
visual and musical landscape countless times. The very thought of seeing some
sort of visualisation of these songs at the up-coming concerts is literally a
dream come true.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Everything
surrounding the ‘Hounds of Love’ project was approaching perfection. The
artwork for the album and subsequent singles was exquisite. In a medium
notoriously expensive and difficult for the artist to control, the promo videos
for ‘Running Up That Hill’, ‘Hounds of Love’ and especially ‘Cloudbusting’,
were some of the best realised visual interpretations of her songs. Even the
B-sides of the singles would become some of my all-time-favourite Kate Bush
songs, with tracks like ‘Under The Ivy’, ‘My Lagan Love’ and ‘The Handsome
Cabin Boy’ all sounding like experiments which may have been proposed chapters
in ‘The Ninth Wave’ sequence.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Virtually
everyone who has meant anything to me in my life has a connection to this album
– old school friends, my art school class and countless former hmv colleagues –
it’s definitely the album which crops up most often in my conversation. I
wonder if anything released in 2014 will have the same lasting impact? Let’s
meet back here in 2044 and see how good that Lorde album sounds then...</div>
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<b>Moment Five: You Don’t Need Words; Just One
Kiss, Then Another</b> - <b>originally posted
8<sup>th</sup> September 2014</b></div>
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<br /></div>
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1989 was a
bit of a landmark year for me; aside from Kate releasing her album, ‘The
Sensual World’, I got my first (and only) proper job working at the hmv store
in Edinburgh’s St. James’ Centre and started the long process of finally
accepting what everyone around me had come to terms with years before, I was
gay. I would eventually come out to some of my closest friends and family the
following year. While I always choose the more ‘traditional’ (and expected),
Kylie’s ‘Better The Devil You Know’, as the song which sums up this period of
my life, the first single and title track to Kate’s latest album could quite
easily have been my ‘coming out song’. Don’t get me wrong, the only thing my
first tentative steps onto the late 80’s/early 90’s Edinburgh gay scene and
Kate’s lustful homage to Molly Bloom’s randy soliloquy from James Joyce’s
‘Ulysses have in common is they both contained the use of the words, “Oh, yes!”
a lot, but the song, and the subsequent album, became my permanent soundtrack
for the next couple of years.<o:p></o:p></div>
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A much
‘softer’ and, in her own words, ‘more feminine’ album, ‘The Sensual World’
contains some of Kate’s best work and, with far less reliance on the fairlight
and synthesised instruments, it has a more ‘organic’ feel and has thus aged far
better than her previous couple of albums.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Highlights
include her work alongside the Bulgarian vocal group Trio Bulgarka, who add
their distinctive singing/chanting, with spectacular effect, to ‘Rocket’s
Tail’, ‘Never Be Mine’, and in particular, ‘Deeper Understanding’. While unable
to speak each other’s language, Kate reported that she managed to convey what
she wanted to the singers using ‘hugs and kisses’ – perhaps this would be the
best way for The Kardashian sisters to communicate in future, eliminating the
risk of cracking their botox assisted masks of perpetual surprise and removing
the need for us to every hear anything else they have to say – the very
definition of ‘Win/Win’. This later song tells the eerily prophetic tale of an
isolated, lonely individual who seeks to find affection and friendship with the
use of a new computer programme – as a desk-bound, would-be writer, working
from home, I definitely understand the temptation to push that ‘Execute’
button!<o:p></o:p></div>
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Alongside
lyrically compelling songs like ‘The Fog’, ‘Love And Anger’ and ‘Between A Man
And A Woman’ sits the story of a woman unwittingly accepting a date with a
pre-war Hitler in ‘Heads We’re Dancing’ – surely the perfect soundtrack to the never-to-be-seen
victory show-dance we were so tragically denied due to Vanessa Feltz’s early
exit from ‘Strictly’ a couple of years back – it all comes together to make
Kate’s most consistent and ‘complete’ sounding LP. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The cherry
on the cake, however, has to be ‘This Woman’s Work’. Rivalling ‘The Man With
The Child In His Eyes’ for its directness and un-fussy delivery, a simple
piano-vocal arrangement allows the song’s lyric to take centre stage and it
packs quite an emotional punch – you have to wonder what was happening in the
charts when the single release stalled at No.25. ‘Love And Anger’ fared even
worse, peaking at No.38, while a cod-reggae cover of Elton John’s ‘Rocket Man’
– recorded for the ‘Two Rooms’ tribute album – released as a stop-gap between
albums would see Kate match the No.12 chart placing for ‘The Sensual World’ title-track.<o:p></o:p></div>
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While it
would be another four years before Kate would release another full album,
1993’s ‘The Red Shoes’, this would seem like a blink of an eye in comparison to
the agonising twelve year wait between ‘The Red Shoes’ and Kate’s eighth studio
album, ‘Aerial’.</div>
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<b>Moment Six: These Moments Given Are A Gift
From Time -</b> <b>originally posted 9<sup>th</sup>
September 2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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While I
consider ‘The Red Shoes’ to be Kate’s weakest collection of songs, it is not
without merit. It’s a typical contradiction that Kate’s least compelling album
contains such undoubted highlights as ‘Lily’, ‘Top Of The City’ and the track
which I more often than not cite as my favourite Kate Bush song, ‘Moments Of
Pleasure’. While one friend – yes, you Niall - agreed with Q Magazine’s description
of the song as being, "so personal as to be impenetrable,” I think it
pretty much sums up everything I love about Kate Bush – deeply personal in a
way which would make it virtually impossible for any other artist to sing it,
lyrically compelling and all wrapped up in a swoon-worthy piano melody. It
would appear the album was forged during a period of deep personal loss and
upheaval for Kate and suffers from a uniquely dense and sometimes muddled
production. The characters and situations contained in songs such as
‘Constellation Of The Heart’, ‘You Are The One’ and ‘Why Should I Love You’
seem unusually pedestrian considering they were written by the same person who
sang about a wife disguising herself as a younger woman to trap her adulterous
husband in ‘Babooshka’, explored weather manipulation in ‘Cloudbusting’ and
sang a whole song from the point of view of a musical instrument in ‘Violin’.
It didn’t help that her choice of collaborators for the album was typically
eccentric and eclectic, ranging from the sublime - Jeff Beck, Eric Clapton,
Prince and Nigel Kennedy – to the ridiculous – Lenny Henry. In the end it would
be another twelve years before Kate would leave these particular creative
partners behind and return to working at her best – so by my reckoning we can
expect Dawn French to say something funny again sometime around April 2022. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Here is
where I risk everything by admitting that I found ‘Aerial’ virtually
impenetrable on its initial release. Over the years I continually failed to
find a way in and the album stood as the only Kate Bush album I never fully
connected with. By the time ‘Director’s Cut’ and ’50 Words For Snow’ came along
– both of which I managed to get to grips with and embraced them for what they
were - I had almost resigned myself to never getting past THAT ‘Washing Machine
Song’ or the (now somewhat unfortunate) ramblings of Rolf Harris. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Looking
back, I realise that the twelve year gap between ‘The Red Shoes’ and ‘Aerial’
must have been the necessary space Kate needed to ‘detox’, freeing herself of
the (comparative) creative stalemate and production excesses which had crept
into her work following her 80’s success and rebuild herself as a completely different
type of recording artist. No longer shackled to the restrictions of traditional
song structures, avoiding any adherence to the rules of ‘verse and chorus’ song
writing, ‘Aerial’ seemed almost jazz-like in its ‘free-form’ outlook and if
there’s one thing I just don’t understand, it’s jazz.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In the build
up to ‘Before The Dawn’, knowing that ‘Aerial’ was sure to play a part in the
forthcoming live shows, I made another attempt to ‘crack the code’ and fully
embrace ‘Aerial’.<o:p></o:p></div>
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To my surprise
I was almost instantly drawn into the album in a way that had completely eluded
me up until now. I recognised countless well-worn Kate motifs in the music and
lyrics, and despite the lack of conventional song structures, I started to make
stylistic connections to my beloved ‘Ninth Wave’ and many more of my favourite
Kate moments. I’m not ashamed to say I had tears running down my face as the
album moved from ‘A Coral Room’ into the ‘An Endless Sky Of Honey’ song cycle
contained on the second disc – the only real embarrassment was the fact that
this happened when I was outside, on the mean streets of Leyton, walking back
from Asda, loaded down with two heavy bags of shopping - all very Mrs
Bartolozzi in itself!<o:p></o:p></div>
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In a way I
feel really lucky; I get to experience ‘Aerial’ as if for the first time over
the next few months, aided by the extraordinary experience of seeing Kate
perform a large chunk of it live. <o:p></o:p></div>
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In the
spirit of ‘Moments Of Pleasure’, I will be drifting backwards through time
tonight, remembering some very special ‘moments’ I have shared with Kate Bush
alongside a similar roll call of great friends and extraordinary people over
the last thirty years or so. I will be remembering every ‘old sock’ and ‘old
shoe’, thinking about the following people on this particular dive ‘into another
moment’; Tracey, Tony, Angie, Helen, Douglas, Lesley, Kelly, Kirsty, Marie,
Jamii and my old school friend Annie (not on Facebook) who started it all.</div>
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<b>Moment Seven – After The Dawn : Somewhere
in between; what the song and silence say -</b> <b>originally posted 10<sup>th</sup> September 2014<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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To put the
‘Before The Dawn’ show into words would be like trying to explain colours to a
blind man, sound to a deaf man, or Piers Morgan’s inexplicable success to
anyone with half a brain, but I’ll try...<o:p></o:p></div>
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I’m
attempting to express my feelings about the experience without actually giving
away too many ‘spoilers’ about the show’s actual content, so forgive me if it
all seems a bit ‘vague’ or ‘woolly’. <o:p></o:p></div>
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My
overriding impression was that this is most definitely not a straight forward
rock concert. You can tell from the moment you turn up outside the venue -
groups of friends standing, not talking, paralysed with expectation and many
still wearing the mask of ‘I-can’t-believe-this-is-happening’ blank stares which
descended over them at the beginning of the year. The crowd were mostly over
thirty - some WAY over thirty - and beyond leaping to their feet at the end of
each song, the entire audience remained seated, transfixed by every note, every
gesture, every wooden puppet unexpectedly springing to life, killing and enthusiastically
devouring a bird....oops, sorry I said I wasn’t going to include spoilers!<o:p></o:p></div>
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Kate and her
amazing cast of musicians and performers has delivered a theatrical show with
only the merest hint of a conventional rock concert coming from the fact that
the band are on stage with her during most of the performance. With a
spectacular light show, projected images and films, puppets, outlandish and
often sinister looking costumed performers, as well as exploding pyrotechnics
and spectacular sets and stage design, this has more in common with a West End
production than the Hammersmith Apollo’s usual fare. With the air of the most
psychedelic and obtuse ‘jukebox musical’ ever staged, ‘Before The Dawn’ is a
very personal journey through what Kate obviously perceives as her career highs
and most accomplished works, held together in a vaguely themed narrative –
imagine if ‘Viva Forever’, the ill-fated Spice Girls musical, had only
contained b-sides and album tracks....wait, that might have actually been
better! By eschewing much of her ‘greatest hits’, and by offering up a
spectacular visual presentation of some of her most complex soundscapes, Kate
presents a retrospective show that actually feels like she’s looking far off
into her own future, rather than dredging grudgingly through her past output. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Despite
being famously stage frightful, Kate herself seemed calm and relaxed throughout
the show, and at one point she sits completely alone at the piano to deliver
the sole selection from her most recent album, ‘Among Angels’ from 2011’s ’50
Words For Snow’, holding the pin-drop silent audience completely under her
spell. Exuding a wave of maternal benevolence over the entire proceedings, it
was easy to forget that Kate has been perfecting the art of ‘keeping oneself to
oneself’ for the majority the last few decades. Perhaps she felt comfortably
‘at home’ in the Hammersmith space she’d previously played on her ‘Tour of
Life’ shows back in the late 70’s, surrounded as she is by friends, family and
several trusted musicians, but maybe she was just enjoying herself.<o:p></o:p></div>
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When,
towards the end of the show, Kate thanked the audience and said, “We’ve had a
lovely time,” I knew she was speaking to me directly, just as the man sitting
next to me knew she was speaking directly to him. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I often feel
jealous watching music documentaries about famous rock stars and influential
musicians when equally famous ‘talking heads’ hold the subject aloft as ‘their
defining inspiration’ or ‘the most important artist in shaping who they have
become’ - the likes of Boy George explaining how important Bowie’s sexual
ambiguity and artful androgyny was to him, or Pixie Lott revealing how a
headless mannequin she once saw in a M&S window became the driving
influence for much of her creative output ever since - I often fear I don’t
have that through-line artist, until I remember I do; I have Kate Bush.
Provocative, infuriating, patience shredding, challenging and, in her own
words, ‘warm and soothing’, her music has become the soundtrack to virtually
every important occasion in my life. I feel that this may have come full circle
with ‘Before The Dawn’, a truly ‘momentous occasion’, most certainly
soundtracked by the music of Kate Bush...in her own words;</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
“We went up
to the top of the highest hill<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
And stopped<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Still<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
It was just
so beautiful...It was just so beautiful...It was just so beautiful...”</div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-70252667386688602702014-01-09T05:35:00.001-08:002014-01-10T04:41:54.258-08:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Lost In Music – 20 ‘forgotten’ pop
classics</span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2013 was the year when Tegan
& Sara’s pop gem, ‘Heartthrob’, struggled to pass the 10,000 UK
sales mark (despite a discounted selling price, the girls in the country for
tour dates & a single - ‘I Was A Fool’ - on heavy rotation at Radio 2)
while Emeli Sande’s hit-filled, bland-fest, ‘Our Version Of Events’, breezed past 2 million UK sales - let’s take a look at 20 more ‘lost’ pop classics from
the past 30 years...</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1 – Holly Valance – State Of Mind – Nov 2003<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> UK Chart position: No. 60 – 2 weeks on UK
album chart – cumulative UK sales: 24,981</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The 2002 debut album ‘Footprints’ was an instant success for the
former ‘Neighbours’ actress. Containing
the number one single ‘Kiss Kiss’ (the saucy ‘peek-a-boo’ nudity of the promo
video had turned the song into a massive
international hit in May of that year) and the number two follow-up ‘Down Boy’,
the album debuted inside the UK Top 10 in October eventually selling over
160.000 copies in the UK. Keen to maintain momentum, the follow up was recorded
within a year and was preceded by the favourably received title track, ‘State
Of Mind’ (No.8 in November 2003). The album contained song-writing and
production credits from Mark Taylor, who’s Metro Production team were riding
high after their work with Cher (‘Believe’), Enrique (‘Hero’) and Kylie (‘On A
Night Like This’), Rick Nowels (Belinda Carlisle, Kim Wilde), Steve Anderson
(Brothers In Rhythm) and dance producer Stuart Crichton (Kylie, Sugababes).
Compared with the sultry but ‘sunny’ Euro-pop of her debut, the sound was far
more experimental and a considerably ‘darker’ mix of retro 80’s synth-pop and a
more mainstream take on the emerging electro-clash sound that was delivering
critical acclaim, but not Top 10 success, for the likes of Goldfrapp and
Ladytron. Within one month Girls Aloud released a similarly ‘flavoured’ cover
of The Pointer Sister’s ‘Jump’ (No.2 in November 2003), which would act as a
sound template for the majority of their future output, reinvigorate their
career and setting them on an unbroken run of 20 Top 10 singles and 5 Platinum
selling albums.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 1.25%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2 – Siobhan
Donaghy – Ghosts – May 2007<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No.92 – 1 week on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 8,851</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The solo career of the former Sugababe had gotten
off to a far from auspicious start. After jumping ship in 2000 after the release
of debut album ‘One Touch’ (and setting in motion the ‘revolving door’
recruitment policy that would end with the eventual reformation of the original
line-up as Mutya Keisha Siobhan in early 2013), Siobhan was signed as a solo
artist and released ‘Revolution In Me’ on London Records in September 2003. The
album peaked at No. 117 and she was subsequently dropped by the label. Donaghy
spent the next couple of years writing, and eventually recording in a <span style="background-color: white; font-size: 10pt;">studio near Barneville-Carteret, France, with producer James
Sanger. The songs were r</span>ecorded independently and licensed to Parlaphone
Records, who eventually issued the resulting album in June 2007 following the
relative failure of the singles ‘Don’t Give It Up’ (No. 45 in April 2007) and
‘So You Say’ (No. 76 in June 2007). The album received predominantly positive
reviews and stands as a heady mix of left-field pop – drawing comparison to its
main influences such as Elizabeth Fraser / The Cocteau Twins, Kate Bush and
Bjork - and the then fashionable laid-back dance grooves (akin to the likes of
Morcheeba and Moloko). Stand-out tracks
include ‘So You Say’ which echoes the laid-back swagger of All Saint’s ‘Pure
Shores’ and ‘Medevac’, icy cool
electronics mixed with soaring, ethereal vocals that bring to mind Florence
Welsh, Kate Bush and Bjork’s ‘Big Time Sensuality’.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 0.44%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3 – Frazier
Chorus – Sue – May 1989<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No .56 – 1 week on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 1,396
(Cherry Red re-issue)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Signed
initially to the independent 4AD label (home to Cocteau Twins, Dead Can Dance
and The Pixies) in 1987, the Brighton four-piece would eventually release their
debut album on Virgin Records in the spring of 1989. The album was preceded by
two quirky, but radio friendly slices of pop perfection, ‘Dream Kitchen’ and
‘Typical’, neither of which broke the UK Top 50 Singles Chart, but which
effectively epitomise their lyrical humour and melancholia, coupled with
sing-a-long melodies and ‘arty’ instrumentation (there were relatively few
singles that year that contained an oboe solo in the middle of the track). The songs are a curious mix of Morrissey at
his most lyrically whimsical (‘Hairdresser On Fire’, ‘Cemetery Gates’) and Pet
Shop Boys at their Alan Bennett-esque, sardonic best (‘Rent’, ‘Being Boring’),
existing as the ‘missing link’ that helped turn The Housmartins into The Beautiful
South (who were, at the time ‘Sue’ was released, enjoying the first of their,
subsequent seven, Top 5 albums).</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 0.075%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4 - Rachel Stevens – Come &
Get It – Oct 2006<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No.28 – 4 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 27,029</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Following on from a hugely successful career with S Club 7 (11
consecutive Top 5 singles and 4 Top 20 albums), Rachel Stevens was the only
member of the group to sign a solo deal with the groups label, Polydor Records.
Presumably no-one from the production team had actually told the label that is
was Jo O’Meara’s vocals which had been the most prominent voice on the majority
of the group’s output! Stevens’ solo career
got off to a decent start with a No.2 single (‘Sweet Dreams My L.A. Ex’) and a
Top 10 album (‘Funky Dory’), but things started to lose focus after the title
track follow-up single failed to make the Top 20. Over the next twelve months
two further Top 3 singles were released (and subsequently stripped onto the
debut album) before work on the follow-up proper began in earnest. Tracks were
recorded with Xenomania (Girls Aloud), Richard X (Liberty X, Will Young)<span style="background-color: white; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">,<span class="apple-converted-space"> Pascal </span>Gabriel
(Erasure, S-Express) and<span class="apple-converted-space"> Jewels & Stone
(5ive, Hear’say, S Club 7). The first two singles (‘Negotiate With Love’ and
‘So Good’) both reached No.10 in the UK during the spring / summer of 2005, but
the album release date kept slipping on the Polydor release schedule, until it
was finally released in October (following the single ‘I Said Never Again (But
Here We Are)’ peaking at No. 12 on the UK single chart) with limited fanfare (and
a launch event at the Walthamstow Dog Racing Track!!!!!). Considering the track
records of the writers and producers involved it’s hard to see why the album
failed to ignite in a fairly desolate pop market. All three singles proper (as
well as the ‘stripped on’ ‘Some Girls) are perfect examples of the pop-dance,
electro-clash sound that was proving so successful for Girls Aloud and album
cuts such as the Cure sampling ‘It’s All About Me’, ‘Crazy Boy’ & ‘I Will
Be There’ are as good as anything released by Kylie in the last 10 years.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 1.35%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5 – Nicola Roberts – Cinderellas Eyes – Oct
2011<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No. 17 – 3 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 19,782</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At some
point in the extended Girls Aloud hiatus that would last from 2009 until 2012,
Nichola Roberts realised that the shoes and handbags weren’t going to pay for
themselves and she needed to pull her finger out and start a solo career. Deciding to take a more experimental approach
and avoid the assembly line writing / production style employed by Girls
Aloud’s key musical collaborators, Xenomania, she began writing and recording
in exploratory studio sessions with producers such as Dragonette (who had just
scored an international hit with Martin Solveig on ‘Hello’ , Diplo (M.I.A. ,
Beyonce) and Joseph Mount (Metronomy, Kate
Nash). Critically acclaimed and lauded in the UK music press, the resulting album
is contemporary sounding and unexpectedly lyrically confessional. In equal parts ambitiously experimental and
palatably commercial. Prior to release, producer Diplo removed samples from
lead single ‘Beat Of My Drum’ to use in (presumably better paying client) Beyonce’s
‘Run The World (Girls)’, her subsequent album ‘4’ went on to sell over 600,000
copies in the UK.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 0.95%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6 - Richard
X – Richard X Presents His X Factor Volume 1 – Sep 2003<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No.31 – 4 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 23,246</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Starting out
as an underground bootleg DJ /producer, Richard Philips, gained notoriety under
the pseudonym Girls On Top, creating genre defining mash-up <span style="background-color: white; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">"We Don't
Give a Damn About Our Friends", which was a mash-up of<span class="apple-converted-space"> Adina Howard’s ‘Freak Like Me’</span> and<span class="apple-converted-space"> Tubeway Army’s’ ‘Are ‘Friends’ Electric’. </span></span>Having
achieved massive commercial success with the Sugababes re-recording of this
track, now just called ‘Freak Like
Me’, Virgin Records signed Richard X as
an artist and he started work on his ambitious debut album. Featuring several
collaborating guest vocalists, cover versions, mash-ups and original material,
the album is hard to define or categorise. Pure pop collaborations with Liberty
X and Kelis delivered two Top 10 singles (‘Being Somebody’ a mash-up of The
Human League’s ‘Being Boiled’ and Rufus & Chaka Khan’s ‘Ain’t Nobody’ and
‘Finest Dreams’ a mix of The S.O.S. Band’s ‘The Finest’ and The Human League’s
‘The Things That Dreams Are Made Of’) and album tracks feature a diverse list
of guest vocalists including Pulp front-man, Jarvis Cocker, ‘Popstars – The
Rivals’ shock evictee, Javine, Soul II Soul legend, Caron Wheeler and ultra-hip
DJ (soon to be pop artist), Annie.
Overall it’s a giddy rollercoaster ride of disco-ball illuminated
electro-pop-dance, offering a sneaky glimpse into the near future of pop music.
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Sales compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version
Of Events – 1.15%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7 – Saint
Etienne – Words & Music By Saint Etienne – Sep 2012<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 26 – 4 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 13,112</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In late 2012
Saint Etienne were at a bit of a crossroads. The bands last few collections of
new material had seem them slowly slipping from chart mainstays to cult status
artists with an extremely loyal fan-base, while suffering the sales dip that
comes with such a slide. Universal Records were marking the end of an on-going
re-issue programme, which had seen the band heavily involved in the compiling and
overseeing of deluxe double CD editions of their back catalogue, with the
release of the ‘Casino Classics’ box-set. This 4 CD collection of the bands
remixes and re-working is a brilliant reminder of their place in the history of
dance culture. All this looking back
seems to have had an effect on the overall feel of their next project. ‘Words
& Music By Saint Etienne’ is practically a concept album charting and celebrating
the bands enduring love of all things pop, club culture and the nostalgia
evoked by music at its most powerful. ‘I’ve Got Your Music’ authentically
recreates and celebrates the relentless positivity of the Stock Aiken Waterman
Hit Factory production-line at its peak, the anticipation and excitement of
early live experiences are explored in ‘Tonight’ and ‘DJ’ perfectly captures
the exhilaration and escapism of staying out late, clubbing and worshiping at
the alter of The Superstar DJ. The
accompanying live shows to support the album saw the band suitably revitalised
and euphoric.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">By far their
most complete and accomplished collection in over a decade.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 0.65%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8 – Robyn –
Body Talk – Jun 2010 / Sep 2010<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Part 1 - UK Chart position: No 47 – 4 weeks on UK
album chart – cumulative UK sales: 24,525</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Part 2 - UK Chart position: No 38 – 2 weeks on UK
album chart – cumulative UK sales: 16,256</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Part 3 - UK Chart position: No 168 – 2 weeks on UK
album chart – cumulative UK sales: 20,066</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Robin Miriam
Carlsson had found success as a teenager, signing to RCA Records at sixteen and
working with in-demand pop producer Max Martin, on UK breakthrough hit ‘Show Me
Love’ (No. 8 in 1998). Within a year, Martin would turn Britney Spears into an
internationally successful pop icon with ‘Baby...One More Time’. Robyn was
ambitious but determined not to be manipulated by her record company and moulded
into the manufactured Pop Princess that was soon to be Spears’ fate. Thus began a half decade long journey of
experimentation and& the eventual setting-up of her label, Konichiwa
Records. In July 2007 the single ‘With Every Heartbeat’ hit No.1 in the UK and
the subsequent self-titled album reached No.11.
The album was a moderate success, but never managed to fully capitalise
on the success of the number one single. It was decided that her next project
needed to reflect the changes in the public’s purchasing habits, embracing the
cherry picking of tracks rather than the downloading of complete albums. The
‘Body Talk’ album would be staggered,
with two ‘bite-sized’ mini-albums and a third ‘full’ album acting as round-up
of the previous two albums with a few new tracks, released between June and
September 2010. Of all the titles on this list, the lack of mainstream
commercial success for the ‘Body Talk’ albums is the most baffling. With an air
of cool credibility, key tracks such as ‘Dancing On My Own’, ‘Indestructible’ and
‘Hang With Me’ pre-date (or plough a similar furrow to) the likes of Rihanna’s
‘We Found Love’, Pink’s ‘Raise Your Glass’ or Kelly Clarkson’s ‘Stronger (What
Doesn’t Kill You) all of which have
enjoyed massive international success.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All three
albums Sales combined compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 3.0%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9 – Natalie
Imbruglia – Come To Life – No official UK Release<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: Did not place on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 2,362</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Former soap actress Natalie Imbruglia built a
hugely prosperous pop career spanning 10 years largely due to the all
encompassing success of her debut single ‘Torn’ and its parent album ‘Left Of
The Middle’. By 2006 Imbruglia had all but abandoned her music career to
concentrate on acting. But when her Oscar for ‘Johnny English’ failed to
materialise, a proposed comeback album was conceived during the promotion of
the ‘Glorious: Greatest Hits’ collection. Tracks recorded over a three year
period, included collaborations with Chris Martin, Coldplay and Brian Eno. The
resulting album showcases a more sophisticated song-writing style within many
varied sonic landscapes – including driving beats and dark atmospherics. In the
UK, Imbruglia’s new label Island Records promoted ‘Want’ as the first single
but when the single failed to penetrate the Top 100 singles chart the album
release was cancelled. Subsequent attempts to licence the album to other UK
labels were fruitless as negotiations proved ‘difficult’ and the album was
never given an official UK release.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 0.12%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">10 – Roisin
Murphy – Overpowered – Oct 2007<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No.20 – 10 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 62,954</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; margin-left: 0cm; margin-right: 0cm; margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As lead singer with
under-appreciated dance/electro/trip-hop duo, Moloko, Murphy had tasted
internationally success with ‘Sing It Back’ (No.4 in September 1999) and the
subsequent ‘Things To Make & Do’ album (No. 3 in April 2000). The groups
label had allowed her to take the time she needed to produce a ‘whenever it’s
ready’ solo album, before asking her to re-consider the direction she was
moving in and produce something a little more ‘radio friendly’ – she refused.
‘Ruby Blue’ was released in June 2005 to mostly positive reviews, but failed to
find a wide audience. When she signed to EMI in May 2006 she stated that she
intended to record a much more commercially accessible pop album with a strong
disco flavour. While it’s hardly Sister Sledge’s ‘We Are Family’, it’s pretty
much ‘mission accomplished’. Tracks such as ‘You Know Me Better’ and ‘Movie
Star’ prowl the sleazy underground clubs of 1970’s San Francisco, creating a throbbing
electro-pulse soundtrack, nodding to Giorgio Moroder’s Kraftwerk inspired
euro-disco, evoking Grace Jones’ post Studio 54, performance artist, cultish
sophistication and adding sly winks to Sylvester and Cerrone’s campy, flamboyant, chemically enhanced, gay
abandon. Only one single managed to
break the UK Top 40 singles chart (‘Let Me Know’ No. 28). This album is by far
the biggest seller on my list...but still only manages the following rating on
the ‘Emeli Sande Scale’:</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sales
compared to Emeli Sande’s ‘Our Version Of Events – 3.1%</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>See also:</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">11 – Win –
Uh Tears Baby – Apr 1987<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 51 – 1 week on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: unknown</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rising from
the ashes of Scottish cult art-rockers, The Fire Engines (no pun intended), Win
grabbed the attention of corporate sponsors (a massively influential McEwan’s
Lager commercial featured their ‘nearest hit’ track ‘You’ve Got The Power’) but
found little commercial success. The dizzying mix of electronic sequencing,
glam beats and crushing power chords, layered with lyrics that cast a satirical
and often humorous eye on popular culture and early ‘80’s politics, contained
in such songs as ‘Un-American Broadcasting’ and ‘Shampoo Tears’, pre-date the
likes of Jesus Jones and Pop Will Eat Itself who achieved widespread acclaim
and fairly decent sales by the end of the same decade.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">12 –
Ladyhawke – Anxiety – Jun 2012<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 36 – 2 weeks on UK album chart – cumulative UK sales: 10,987</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">New Zealand
born ‘Pip’ Brown achieved a degree of commercial success with her eponymous
debut album in 2008, following critical acclaim for her ‘Paris Is Burning’ and ‘My
Delirium’ tracks. Her follow-up should have seen her move onto the next level. Record
company wrangles saw the album’s released pushed back from the October 2011 to
June 2012 and with no hit singles, ‘Anxiety’ came and went within a fortnight. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">13 – Tracie
– Far From The Loving Kind – Jun 1984<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 64 (original release) – 1 week on UK album chart – cumulative UK
sales: 1,182 (Cherry Red re-issue)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Discovered
when she answered an ad in Smash Hits placed by Paul Weller during a search to
find artists for his fledgling Respond label, Tracie went on to sing backing
vocals on both the last single by The Jam (‘Beat Surrender’) and the first by
The Style Council (‘Speak Like A Child’) before launching her own career with ‘The
House That Jack Built’ – a No.9 hit in 1983 written by her Respond label mates,
Scottish indie poppers, The Questions. Despite production and song-writing
assistance from Weller and Elvis Costello, none of the other singles from her
debut album made the Top 20 and the album was released with little fanfare. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">14 – Shaznay Lewis – Open – Jul 2004<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart position: No 22 – 6 weeks on UK album
chart – cumulative UK sales: 31,552</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After co-writing some of All Saints biggest hits
(including the number one singles ‘Never Ever’ and ‘Pure Shores’), Lewis looked
set for solo stardom when the band split under a cloud of money disputes and a
fight over who would wear a certain jacket during a photo-shoot...good to see
that it wasn’t anything trivial then girls! Her first single, ‘Never Felt Like
This Before’ peaked at No.9, but the album failed to make the Top 20 and a
follow-up single stalled outside the Top 40 singles chart. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">15 – Sia –
Some People... - <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: 106 – 5 weeks on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 30,257</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Before she
became the number one songwriter on everyone’s speed dial, Sia Kate Isobelle
Furler was a struggling singer-songwriter who had been chipping away at the
music industry for more than a decade. While a fluke Top 10 single (‘Taken For
Granted’) in 2000 has yet to be matched as a solo performer, she has written massive
hit songs for Rihanna (‘Diamonds’), Lea Michelle (‘Cannonball’), Ne-Yo (‘Let Me
Love You’) and Celine Dion (‘Love Me Back To Life’) as well as collaborating with
Flo Rida (‘Wild Ones’) and David Guetta (‘She Wolf’ and the No.1 single ‘Titanium’).
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">16 – The
Pipettes – We Are the Pipettes – Jul 2006<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 41 – 6 weeks on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 31,562</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Formed as ‘an
experiment in manufactured pop’ by indie singer-songwriter Robert Barry
(Monster Bobby) to showcase an updated twist on the Phil Spector girl-group wall-of-sound,
the girl’s line-up employed a revolving door policy second only to The
Sugababes. A couple of extremely catchy singles (‘Pull Shapes’, ‘You’re Kisses
Are Wasted On Me’) saw them crack the UK Top 40, but there was no momentum into
the album release and after a respectable six week chart run the band failed to
trouble the UK chart compilers again.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">17 – Tracey
Thorn – Out Of the Woods – Mar 2007<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 38 –4 weeks on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 25,800</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As one half
of Everything But The Girl, Thorn had her fair share of success and world-wide
acclaim, but her post-EBTG solo efforts have had been largely ignored by the
band’s broader audience. Produced by dance producer and remixer Ewan Pearson, the
album mutated from (as Thorn herself described it) a “quick little record, a
little bit acoustic, a little bit dance” into a full-on, pop masterpiece.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">18 – Paul
Haig – Rhythm of Life – Oct 1983<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 82 – 2 weeks on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: unknown</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After his
stint as lead singer with Scottish Indie darlings Josef K, this was Haig’s
debut solo album and hopes were high. Signed as a solo artist to Island records
and packed off to New York with Alex Sadkin (fresh from his success producing
Grace Jones, The Thompson Twins and Duran Duran) the resulting album is an
early ‘80’s classic. Unfortunately reviews pitched Haig as falling
catastrophically between two stools – the slick dance/pop sound was considered
too commercial to be taken seriously by his Josef K fan base and slightly too cutting
edge and ahead of it’s time for the pure pop, New Romantic crowd.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">19 – Annie –
Don’t Stop<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: 126 – 1 week on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 4,069</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Similar to
Ladyhawke, Annie had become an indie/pop/dance darling after making the largely
unprecedented move from DJ to recording artist with her ‘Anniemal’ debut in 2004
– including underground smash, ‘Chewing Gum’. Now signed to Island Records, the second album
was recorded, including collaborations with man-of-the-moment Richard X, Girls
Aloud hitmakers Xenomania and future Adele producer Paul Epworth. Unfortunately
the label didn’t like what they heard and declined to release the album. It was
eventually issued on an independent label over a year later.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">20 – Gossip
– A Joyful Noise – May 2012<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK Chart
position: No 47– 2 weeks on UK Album Chart – cumulative UK sales: 12,541</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sony Music had
signed Beth Ditto and her band after their breakthrough hit ‘Standing In The
Way Of Control’ only for the next album, ‘Music For Men’, to land with a fairly
heavy thud in 2009 - everywhere except Germany that is – the first single
release, ‘Heavy Cross’, becoming one of the biggest selling songs in German
history, enjoying a record breaking 82 weeks in the Top 100 Singles Chart. Their success on mainland Europe guaranteed them
another bite of the cherry and the next album would see them collaborate with
Xenomania and saw them cross the line into pure pop. No-one in the UK seemed to
care! The album failed to break the UK Top 40 and none of the singles even
charted. The album was however a substantial hit abroad, hitting the Top 5 in
Austria, France and Germany, while going all the way to No.1 in Switzerland. </span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-9648505960286141672014-01-07T07:58:00.002-08:002014-01-14T03:56:31.646-08:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">MY 2013 MOVIE TOP 20</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Due to my ongoing ‘unemployability issues’, I spent a lot of
2013 drowning my sorrows in gallons of visual treats at the local Cineworld
(and Waterloo IMAX). I saw 127 different movies on the big screen and here is
my pick of the best 20, a few honourable mentions and the worst 10 films I saw
this year. Dim the lights...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.20 - The Impossible</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Despite controversy involving the switching of the
protagonist family’s nationality from book to film adaptation and criticism
that suggested that by focusing on a some wealthy, white tourists the
filmmakers had belittled the devastation endured by thousands of Thailand
natives who suffered (or lost their lives) during the 2004 Indian Ocean
tsunami, I found Juan Antonio Bayona’s film extremely respectful and moving.
Both Ewan McGregor and Naomi Watts give solid and affecting performances – to
be administered liberally as a reminder of Watts’ acting chops immediately
after any viewing of ‘Diana’ – and the fifteen year-old lead, Tom Holland,
gives an emotionally charged performance that belies his age, reminiscent of
Christian Bale’s introductory turn in Spielberg’s underrated masterpiece,
‘Empire of the Sun’. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.19 - Blue Jasmine</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many critics raved that ‘Blue Jasmine’ would be hailed as
“the biggest Woody in years” - ironically this was, word-for-word, Woody
Allen’s diary entry for the first night he met Soon-Yi, Mia Farrow’s adopted daughter
– while others proclaimed that Cate Blanchett’s performance saw her
“penetrating deeply into a profoundly troubled woman” – bizarrely this was also
‘The National Enquirer’ headline the day after Allen’s relationship with
Soon-Yi went public. Joking aside, while many claimed this was not a ‘classic’
Woody Allen film, overpowered by an Oscar worthy performance from Blanchett, I
think the film had a lot more going for it than her admittedly powerful
portrayal of a woman on the verge. Riffing freely on ‘A Streetcar Named Desire’
and feeling more ‘contemporary’ and ‘relevant’ than anything Allen has written
or directed since his 70’s/80’s heyday, this is a solid addition to Allen’s
filmography.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.18 - Nebraska</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ve spent a fair bit of time with Alexander Payne in my
head this year – no, this is not my sad admission of some bizarre mid-life
crisis, ageing filmmaker fetish – he directed ‘The Descendants’ starring
Shailene Woodley, whom I’ve spent a good few months researching for ‘The Book’
(available to pre-order on Amazon now and in all good bookshops March 2014).
‘Nebraska’ is a typically low-key, but powerful film. It is (surprisingly)
funny and moving, with great performances from Bruce Dern, Will Forte and
especially June Squibb as Dern’s, ‘I’m only truth-telling’, no-filter spouce. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.17 - The Bling Ring</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So unbelievable it really needs the ‘based on true
events’ message to run along the bottom of the screen throughout the film,
Sofia Coppola’s fifth film as director tells the story of an infamous group of
Californian teenagers who went on a year-long breaking and entering spree
through the Hollywood Hills homes of the rich and famous in 2008. Satirical and
playful, but using some real court transcripts and dialog lifted from
interviews with the actual teens, the film doesn’t try to manipulate the
audience into feeling sorry for the ‘poor little rich kids’ and equally refuses
to judge their actions. Some great work from a cast of, predominately,
newcomers, with a special mention for a stand-out performance from Emma Watson.
Awesome! Who knew! </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.16 - One Direction - This Is Us (3D)</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I grew up on the outskirts of Edinburgh and as a curious
teenager I recall, during my many exploratory visits into the city centre,
seeing an old, run down, porno cinema called La Scala Electric – still showing
lurid looking XXX films well into the early 1980’s. The front of the building
had an intoxicatingly dangerous and grubby allure and everyone had a vague idea
of what went on there (although you never saw anyone actually entering or
leaving). Now I was never brave enough to attempt to buy a ticket or sneak into
a screening of the big porno hits of the time (‘Raiders of the Licked Arse’, ‘9
to 5 Inches’, ‘On Golden Showers’ - I’m guessing here, but I’ll bet they all
exist), but I’m assuming it would have felt something akin to how I felt buying
a ticket to see ‘One Direction – This Is Us’. I can also only assume that the
experience would have had a similarly life affirming effect – okay, maybe not.
I’m a big fan of shows like ‘X Factor’ and ‘American Idol’ but I tend to lose
interest in most of the music and artists these shows create. I had no strong
opinion either way about One Direction. ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ is a near
perfect slice of post-‘Glee’ pop and the singles from their new album show a
savvy understanding of the need for boy bands to tailor their material for (as
well as mature at the same rate as) their (predominately female) fan base. But
nothing could have prepared me for how much I loved this movie. Aside from the
obligatory, scream inducing, spare pair of pant necessitating concert footage,
the film gives the viewer a rare insight into what it’s really like to walk on
stage to face a massive arena crowd – you are reminded that these ‘pop idols’
are actually ‘just kids’, their nerves are sometimes (understandably) palpable
and it has more than a passing resemblance to the ‘in the thick of battle’
opening scenes from ‘Saving Private Ryan’. The strongest impression you are
left with is that despite the obvious perks that come with the success, the
inevitability of the band’s ‘moment in the sun’ ending means the schedule is
relentless and the work-load extreme, there is also real heartbreak for the
parents who waved goodbye to their teenage sons as they headed off to an ‘X
Factor’ audition, only for them to never really come home again. Forget what
you think you know, forget the music and enjoy the best concert movie I’ve seen
since ‘Stop Making Sense’. Check out the ‘extended fan cut’ of the film that
appeared briefly in cinema’s at the end of the theatrical run – presumably with
the boy’s ACTUAL fifteen minutes of fan tacked on at the end. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.15 - Alan Partridge : Alpha Papa</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I could never be described as a massive fan of Steve
Coogan’s Alan Partridge, but everything I’d seen over the years had made me
laugh and I caught the whole of the ‘Mid Morning Matters’ series when it aired
on Sky Atlantic in 2012. ‘Alpha Papa’ made me belly-laugh from start to finish
- from the lip-synching Roachford drive to the finale shoot-out. The film
succeeds in growing the comedy (and the situation) just enough for its
transition from TV to cinema (without Alan heading off on a hilarious mishap
filled holiday or taking a fish-out-of-water job on an American radio station).
Packing more laughs into its ninety minutes running time than every other
‘comedy’ film I saw this year put together, ‘Alpha Papa’ was by far my funniest
film of the year.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.14 - Blackfish</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The only ‘normal’ (i.e non-IMAX) film I paid money to see
this year – isn’t it funny how the Unlimited card direct debit doesn’t even register
as ‘payment’ anymore – and it was worth every penny. Another ‘expose’ type
nature documentary (along the same lines as ‘The Cove’) telling the story of
one particular Killer Whale (Tilikum), who was involved in the deaths of three
individuals during his thirty years in captivity, culminating in the highly
publicised death of Dawn Brancheau, one of SeaWorld, Orlando’s most experienced
trainers in 2010. With breathtaking library footage of Orca whales in the wild
as well as in captivity, expert testimony and contributions from several
ex-trainers, the film is thought provoking and informative, without over
stressing its agenda. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.13 - World War Z (3D)</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In 2002, after a preview showing of ’28 Days Later’, I
was lucky enough to attend a Q&A session with Danny Boyle (Director) and
Alex Garland (Screenwriter) where they discussed sections of the first draft
script that had failed to make the finished film due to budget restraints.
Amongst the scenes they had story-boarded, but never filmed, was an extended
sequence where the group of survivors flee England in a jumbo jet (flown by a
blind pilot) while hoards of ‘zombies’(or ‘Infected’ as they insisted on
calling them) attack the plane, throwing themselves into the engines as it
takes off. I’d always wondered what these scenes would have looked like had
Boyle and Garland been able to fully realise their vision. Ten years on, I was
pleased to see that Marc Forster managed to deliver something of that scale and
excitement with his, considerably more expensive, ‘World War Z’. Despite a well
documented ‘troubled production’, a completely re-shot ending, criticism
concerning its disregard for the source novel and the kind of pre-release
scoffing usually reserved for the mega-budget output of James Cameron, Gore
Verbinski and Michael Bay, against all the odds, ‘World War Z’ became a $500
million worldwide hit and a sequel has already been green-lit. Marc Foster
delivers the best opening set-piece in any film I saw this year – in under ten
minutes a cosy family breakfast of pancakes and an everyday school run descends
into a full-scale city centre zombie melt-down – and the pace never really lets
up, with several nail-biting set-pieces, leading to the Welsh bio-lab set
finale. Many reviewers had a problem with this relatively down-beat,
‘tacked-on’ ending, but in retrospect it’s a refreshing alternative to the
over-the-top, bombastic, bash-fest final acts of the summer’s big blockbusters
(‘Man of Steel’, ‘Wolverine’, ‘Iron Man 3’). Especially effective is the
slightly longer blu-ray cut that re-instates some of the films more
bloodthirsty moments and lets the film ‘breathe out’ a little. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.12 - Behind the Candelabra</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Michael Douglas and Matt Damon give the performances of
their careers in this HBO funded bio-pic – made for TV in the US but given a
theatrical release in the UK. The film explores the relationship between
Liberace and his long-time companion Scott Thorson – a relationship so twisted
and unhealthy it makes Nigella Lawson and Charles Saatchi look like giddy
teenage sweethearts. Steven Soderbergh directs with a great eye for detail and
never lets the camp excess seem anything but normal in the pair’s artificially
enhanced lifestyle. The real tragedy is that, as a made-for-TV movie, ‘Behind
the Candelabra’ and the performances of Douglas, Damon and a scene stealing Rob
Lowe, won’t be eligible for the Oscar glory they deserve.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.11 - Sunshine On Leith</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It was with some confusion that I read about a new
musical, featuring the songs of The Proclaimers, set in Edinburgh of all
places. This was the city in which I was born and raised and despite having its
fair share of ‘gay-innuendo’ locations – Arthur’s Seat, The Mound and everyone
I know has had a good lick of Edinburgh Rock in their time – I would imagine
that San Francisco, New York and Brighton were more appropriate locations to
set a musical. Then, when I actually saw the trailer for ‘Sunshine On Leith, I
posted on Facebook that I had lost all power of subjective reasoning on the
matter, so swept away was I by the views of my beautiful home-town and the
strains of The Proclaimers’ ‘Over and Done With’ blasting out on the soundtrack
- I couldn’t decide whether the film would be ‘pure-dead-brilliant’ or ‘utter
pish’! To be honest, I still don’t know. I started crying from the moment the
camera swept up from the Water of Leith into Edinburgh’s city centre and I was
emitting full, gulping sobs by the time everyone was “walking 500 miles” (and
walking 500 more) on the steps of the Scottish National Gallery. I may be
having some sort of patriotism induced mid-life crisis.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.10 - Good Vibrations</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This independent film, which tells the story of Terri
Hooley (founder of Belfast’s influential Good Vibrations record store and
label), was an unexpected gem. Hooley is credited with bringing punk-rock to
Ireland and was instrumental in discovering The Undertones in the late 1970’s.
The film is a fairly straight forward, frank and funny re-telling of his few
highs and many more lows. I missed Punk by about three years – ’77 was all about
‘Star Wars’ for me and it would be a good couple of years before I became
completely transfixed by the charms of Debbie Harry, Thereza Bazar and David
Van Day (but that’s another story) – so the real connection to the time, the
music or ‘the movement’ are pretty much lost on me, but the scene in which an
unsuspecting Hooley gets swept up in the euphoria of his first punk gig had me
shedding a few tears as it perfectly encapsulates the energy and power to
transform that a passion for music can generate. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.9 - The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug (3D)</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Peter Jackson really does know how to put a big budget,
large scale adventure film together – the real problem seems to be that he just
doesn’t know when to stop. The argument against turning the virtually
pamphlet-like ‘The Hobbit’ into nearly nine hours of film is lost on me – the
source novel is a separate thing, a starting point. This is ‘Peter Jackson’s –
The Hobbit’ and I’m willing to go along for that ride. ‘An Unexpected Journey’
had many flaws – it took too long to really get going, the songs were a self
indulgent mistake and the humour in the Troll sequence makes ‘Mrs Brown’s Boys’
look like a Noel Coward comedy – but on repeated viewings, I forgave it most of
its faults – Trolls! No! But it looks like spending some time with Spielberg
making the ‘Tin Tin’ movie has rubbed off on Jackson and the sequel, ‘The
Desolation of Smaug’, doesn’t waste much time getting to the point - The point
being ‘fun’ and ‘excitement’ - ramping
up the action and maintaining a fairly even, steady pace from beginning to end.
From the giant spiders of Mirkwood to the empty barrel/river escape from the
Elvenking’s prison, ‘Smaug’ is a theme park ride waiting to happen. It’s easy,
in the wake of all this spectacle, to overlook that Martin Freeman has, over
both movies, delivered a brilliantly textured comic performance as Bilbo
Baggins – virtually unrecognisable physically and in tone from his on-going
turn as Dr John Watson in ‘Sherlock’ - just one of many great performances in
the film- even Orlando
‘Thank-you-thank-you-thank-you-Mr-Jackson-I-just-couldn’t-have-done-another-episode-of-Casualty’
Bloom doesn’t let the side down. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.8 - The Hunger Games: Catching Fire </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m a big fan of ‘The Hunger Games’ books and was more
relieved than anything else when the first movie didn’t turn out to be as
stilted and creatively underwhelming as the hugely successful (but mostly laugh
out loud awful) ‘Twilight’ movies. Gary Ross’s direction gave the first film of
the trilogy (saga?) a much edgier, more vibrant and kinetic visual style and
Jennifer Lawrence’s Katniss Everdeen instantly achieved a depth and exuded the kind of charisma that Kristen Stewart’s Bella Swan had struggled to reach across five
movies. On the down side, Ross had failed to fully convey the less obvious
elements of the Katniss/Peeta/Gale ‘love triangle’ and in the climax of the
film, down-playing the full extent of
Peeta’s injuries and helplessness undermines Katniss’s need to protect him,
lowering the dramatic stakes as the characters move into the second film –
Peeta is supposed to have lost a leg due to the injuries he has sustained and
doesn’t know how to swim as he enters the water-logged arena at the beginning
of ‘Catching Fire’. News that the sequel would be directed by someone else was
seen as a mixed blessing. With Ross out and Francis Lawrence in, ‘Catching
Fire’ spends much of its first half redressing some of the minor niggles I had
with the first film – quickly clarifying the fact that Katniss isn’t really
that interested in having a romantic relationship with anyone (she’s a little
bit busy trying to stay alive and sparking a revolution thank you very much!),
forcing home the importance of the ‘fake’ couple she has created with Peeta in
order to maintain their place in The Capital’s affections, as well as showing
the reality of Peeta’s ‘unrequited love’. Stripped of most of the first films
tabloid baiting ‘kids killing kids’ premise, ‘Catching Fire’ is a much more
straight forward action adventure with several obstacles to overcome before its
explosive conclusion. The success of the first film ensured that ‘Catching
Fire’, with almost twice the budget, would deliver bigger and better special
effects and set-pieces. Time will tell if this second instalment will become
the definitive ‘Hunger Games’ movie – It seems unlikely that the comparatively
‘doomy’, down-beat and positively grim final act of ‘Mockingjay’ will be
selling many ‘Subway’ happy meals. Like ‘The Empire Strikes Back’, the other
great ‘middle film’ in a beloved fantasy franchise, ‘Catching Fire’ ends under
a cloud of uncertainty - one of our heroes is similarly captured and imprisoned
and, in a startling final moment, with a dramatic close-up on the face of a
rescued Katniss, we see her expression change, showing her ultimate realisation
of what has happened and what she must become – she must take on the mantle,
and embracing the role, of the ‘Mockingjay’.
21<sup>st</sup> November 2014 can’t come fast enough!</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.7 - The Way, Way Back</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Following in a long tradition of disillusioned teens in
coming-of-age movies that includes ‘The Graduate’, ‘Stand By Me’ and more recently,
‘Adventureland’ and ‘The Perks Of Being A Wallflower’, ‘The Way, Way Back’ was
both funny and charming in equal measure. Scene-stealing performances from TV
‘superstars’ Steve Carell and Allison Janney threaten to overpower the delicate
realism on display from the rest of the cast, but the affection generated by
Liam James’ portrayal of Duncan and the life-changing relationships he nurtures
with Sam Rockwell’s Owen and the other workers at the local water park, ‘Water
Wizz’, are enough to give the film the balance it needs to be truly affecting
and uplifting.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.6 - Captain Phillips</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was lucky enough to see ‘Captain Phillips’ at a London
Film Festival screening slightly ahead of its general release and while I’m not
sure who I thought actually made up these festival audiences, I was surprised
to find out that the crowd, whom I assumed would be the film-watching ‘elite’ –
critics, media and ‘real’ film fans – were actually a bigger bunch of twats
than the average Cineworld crowd I spend most of my spare time with. In a
sold-out cinema, several people arrived long after the film had started and the
woman in front of me took THREE separate phone calls during the performance.
Despite all this going on I was pretty much gripped from beginning to end by ‘Captain
Phillips’. Although the film hits many tried and tested story beats, Paul
Greengrass adds layers that ensure you become totally immersed and care enough
about the people on both sides of the story. This is the flip-side of every
action movie you’ve ever seen – imagine Mike Leigh directing ‘Under Siege’.
What pushes this movie into my Top 10 is Tom Hank’s performance. He seems to
have lost some ground in the Oscar race, but in the last twenty minutes of the
film, Hanks delivers the rawest and most heart-breaking scene I saw this
year. Also the best 'add a word/ruin a movie' I came up with this year - 'Captain Mark Phillips'.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.5 - Philomena</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve Coogan was definitely ‘having a moment’ in 2013. He
not only delivered my comedy of the year (with ‘Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa’)
and launched a billion, “tee-hee! He said Bottom” jokes thanks to his voice
work on ‘Despicable Me 2’, he also co-wrote and starred, alongside a
top-of-her-game Judi Dench, in ‘Philomena’. The subject matter may have already
been explored - in the rather darker, more divisive ‘Magdalene Sisters’ – but
the charming and smart script packed an emotional punch and more laughs than 95%
of the so-called ‘comedies’ I saw this year – well all the ones that didn’t
feature Steve Coogan anyway.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.4 - Before Midnight </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was more than a little surprised that mid-year an early
contender for my film of the year was ‘Before Midnight’, the third instalment
of the long gestating relationship saga that I didn’t even know I was waiting
for. This is a movie with no special effects, no ‘fast-cut’ editing or emotion
prompting score. The takes are long & filled with tightly scripted, but
improvised sounding, dialog and it has a main cast of just two actors (Julie
Delpy and Ethan Hawke) both in their early forties, neither
of whom (with the greatest respect) would described themselves as
A-listers. Maybe it’s the throw-back to Woody Allen at his wise-cracking,
relationship analysing best. All I can say is that despite not particularly
relating to the characters circumstances or lifestyle, I cared about what
happened to them, I laughed (a lot) and the movie delivered my favourite line
of dialog this year – Celine is trying to express how difficult it had been
raising the couples young daughters alone, while Jesse was away on book tours
or writing breaks, resorting to walking the city streets at night with the girls
in a double pushchair, trying to lull them to sleep. She recalls an incident
when a man tried to attack her, but gave up because she looked ‘so pathetic’ -
She says, “That’s the one good thing about being over 35, you don’t get raped
so much”. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>No.3 - Star Trek : Into Darkness (3D)</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On its initial release, I went to see <i>Star Trek: Into Darkness</i> three times at
the cinema and scored it a more than solid 9/10. I described it as “an
‘everything-I-could-possibly-have-wanted’ Star Trek movie”. Proving that JJ’s
original ‘Star Trek’ had assembled a near perfect cast, it’s the strength of
these actors working individually and in different groupings that really shines
in <i>Into Darkness</i>. The deepening
friendship and mutual respect that acts as the glue to every Kirk/Spock related
<i>Star Trek</i> story is central to <i>Into Darkness</i> and acts as a believable
touchstone for the events of the film’s final coda. Don’t get me wrong, I still
have problems with that final act – following (but flipping) the final
resolution to <i>Wrath of Khan</i> is just
the wrong side of ‘affectionate referencing’ for me and I would have been happier
if they’d had the confidence in their audience to carry Kirk’s ‘resurrection’
over into film No.3, but to be honest, that’s a small niggle in a mountain of
large gold nuggets. The pre-backlash Benedict Cumberbatch adds real weight to,
what might be in another’s hands, some fairly over-wrought dialogue – the first
prison-cell scene is pitch-perfect and his delivery of the “I will walk over
your cold corpses to recover my people” line is chilling and exhilarating in
equal measure. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s in the script department that <i>Into Darkness</i> really sets itself apart. There are numerous
grand-standing speeches and some very quotable lines.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There’s no shortage of edge-of-your-seat set pieces
either - The entire Kronos sequence bodes well for Episode VII, riffing as it does
on several key <i>Star Wars</i> moments
including the Millennium Falcon escape from the exploding Death Star at the end
of <i>The Return of the Jedi </i>and the
dog-fight escape from Mos Eisely in <i>Star
Wars. </i>The warp-speed chase between the ‘Enterprise’ and the ‘Vengeance’ is
visually dazzling and, after the finale free-fall from space, the ‘Enterprise’
rising through the clouds might be the ultimate <i>Star Trek</i> ‘money-shot’. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Best of all is the ‘space jump’ between the two
Federation Starships - Exhilarating, tense and a master-class in the use of
special effects and sound-design. News of this sequence must have elicited a
few beads of cold sweat from Alfonso Cuarón, the director of ‘Gravity’ -
considering that his four-years-in-the making, ‘ground-breaking’ and ‘uniquely
innovative’ film’s plot hinges on a lengthy sequence that involves his
characters ‘space walking’ in a deadly debris field as they try to escape from
a destroyed space shuttle to the safety of a nearby space station! I reject the
revisionist reviewing that went on during the films DVD/Blu-Ray release and
stand by ‘Into Darkness’ as a worthy entry to the ‘Star Trek’ franchise. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.2 -Oblivion (IMAX)</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Joseph Kosinski’s definitely knows something about
creating visually compelling and immersive movies, his last film was ‘Tron:
Legacy’ – Disney’s flawed but never less than intriguing franchise re-boot –
and in ‘Oblivion’ he delivered the most enjoyable slice of non-franchise sci-fi
this year. Many dismissed the film as being ‘style over substance’, but with
‘style’ like that I think I can overlook any shortcomings in the ‘substance’
department. Most of the criticism I read was thinly veiled dislike for Tom
Cruise, and while Cruise’s days of troubling ‘Award’s Season’ seem to be over, alongside
‘Gravity’ and ‘World War Z’, ‘Oblivion’ was a startling reminder of the value
of good old fashioned ‘Star Power’. Cruise, and an excellent Andrea
Riseborough, along with top of the range visual design and a great score from
M83 (also my favourite soundtrack of the year) elevate a fairly well-trodden
premise to become the film I saw more times on the big screen than any other
(four) in 2013.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No. 1 – Gravity (IMAX 3D)</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> “At 372 miles
above the earth, there is nothing to carry sound, no air pressure, no oxygen,
life is impossible.” From the first shot of the first trailer it was clear that
this was going to be a strong contender for my movie of the year - George and
Sandra in space, explosions in space, Hank Williams in space - and the finished
film didn’t disappoint. On the surface it’s a fairly old-fashioned edge-of-your-seat
fight for survival, but if you want to look closer you might just catch a
glimpse of someone exploring the instinctual need we have to make and maintain connections
in life - to friends, to colleagues, to family, to our planet and maybe even to
God...But with a (refreshingly) short running time, in the end, ‘Gravity’
(thankfully) doesn’t have much time for navel-gazing and what it lacks in plot
and insightful dialogue is more than compensated for in its unparalleled visuals
and technical complexity. As Billy Bragg (and then Kirsty MacColl) once said,
“It's wrong to wish on space hardware”, but I can’t help wishing I’d seen a few
more movies that so thoroughly transported me to somewhere I’ve never been
before. In a year filled with some incredible visual treats, ‘Gravity’ was undoubtedly
a cut above. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>HONOURABLE
MENTIONS – The Next Ten:</b></span><b><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cloud Atlas</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Wachowskis and Tom Tykwer attempted to bring David
Mitchell’s ‘unfilmable’ novel to the big screen and the resulting film is
impossible to categorise, frustrating, confusing, bum-numbingly long but never
short of fascinating. A visual feast and an unexpected triumph.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lincoln</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The script was a little ‘dry’ for me, but Daniel Day Lewis’s
performance was truly mesmerising. I can honestly say it’s the first time I’ve
watched a film and had to keep reminding myself that I was watching an actor,
not a real person.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In The House</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This French psychological comedy is (shockingly) the only
foreign language film in my list – unless you count ‘Sunshine On Leith’ which
probably was subtitled in one particular Morningside cinema. Surprisingly funny
and deliciously twisted.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Place Beyond The Pines</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This year’s biggest surprise in terms of what the film
actually delivered compared to what was hinted at in the trailer. More of a
family saga than a straight forward crime drama, the film had a lot more to
offer than Ryan Gosling’s best performance of the year (sorry Nicholas, If I
want two hours of perfume commercials, I’ll watch the ad breaks during ‘The X
Factor’ in Christmas week). </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Iron Man 3</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A minor disappointment – but a triumph in comparison to
‘Wolverine’ and ‘Man of Steel’ – The final sequence is a master-class in big
budget, effects heavy, action cinema, which just about makes up for a soggy
middle act, a horribly miss-cast child actor and too much Tony Stark (as
opposed to Iron Man).</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kick-Ass 2</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I almost didn’t see ‘Kick-Ass 2, the reviews being so
awful, but was glad I did. Filled with satisfying character development and a
welcome continuation of the first film’s off-kilter humour and approach to the
super-hero genre, I can almost forgive the shameless inclusion of a truly
terrible Union J song. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Enough Said</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fine performances from the late James Gandolfini and the
underrated Julia Louis-Dreyfus elevated this gentle, observational comedy. With
so much going on, and with such a great supporting cast, this could easily have
been extended and re-written as the whole first season of a great sit-com.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Don Jon</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Most notable for featuring a Scarlett Johansson
performance which has forced ‘A Tony French Opinion U-turn’! Sharp and
incredibly funny.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All Is Lost</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A perfect companion piece for ‘Captain Philips’ and this
virtually dialog free film is a forceful reminder that ‘less can definitely be
more’. Someone should pop a note through to Quentin Tarantino! </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Le Week-end</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A brilliant study in the ebb and flow of affection that
occurs in every long-term relationship and great comic performances from
Lindsay Duncan, Jim Broadbent and, a scene stealing, Jeff Goldblum.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BOTTOM 10 – THE
WORST MOVIES OF 2013</span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Movie 43</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">By far the worst thing I saw this year (and when you see
some of the others, you will fully understand the depths to which it sinks).
Someone, somewhere has a some really juicy dirt on some of Hollywood’s biggest
stars – That’s the ONLY explanation for this mess.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Bula Quo!</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Not only did I go to see this, it was the World Premiere
in Leicester Square! Who says that my social life has taken a hit since I
stopped working at hmv? So bad it’s just really, really, really bad. Makes
‘Spiceworld’ look like...no! wait, that’s really awful too....</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Runner Runner</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The worst ‘real’ movie I saw this year. People spent a
long time and money putting this together and it really doesn’t show. Ben
Affleck, not so much phoning in a performance, but actually sending it in using
Morse code and Timberlake’s dead-eyed stare that counts as emotion is
hilarious. The scene in which he faces of with a gang of Puerto Rican mafia
thugs is as convincing as watching a rap battle between Daniel O’Donnell and
Chuck D. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Diana</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why? There are undoubtedly interesting stories to be told
about the life of Diana Spencer, this made-up, sub-Mills and Boone romance
isn’t one of them. Poor Naomi Watts! The tsunami was a walk in the paddling
pool compared to the mauling she got from the press on this one. Highlight
being Watts walking out of an interview with Simon Mayo on the ‘Mayo and
Kermode Film Review’ – still available as a podcast and well worth a listen. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Quartet</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you find ‘Antiques Roadshow’ “a bit controversial” and
consider “Call The Midwife” ‘real drama’, then this is definitely for you. I,
on the other hand, thought it was bloody awful! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Papadopoulos and Sons</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A truly mind-numbing British ‘comedy’ that would have
been rejected by The Children’s Film Foundation for being ‘too childish’ and ‘unsophisticated’.
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Identity Thief</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Another tragic miss-use of Melissa McCarthy’s obvious
talents – see also ‘The Heat’ – Not funny! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Host</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Low expectations were well and truly met by Stephanie
Meyer’s first post-‘Twilight’ offering. Relying heavily on the kind of internal
dialog last heard in the ‘Look Who’s Talking’ franchise, this, along with the
insipid ‘How I Live Now’, made it a very bad year for (the undoubtedly
talented) Saoirse Ronan. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jack The Giant Slayer</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A long and troubled production – I saw a trailer for this
in the US as far back as 2011 – this has to be the worst Nicholas Holt film of
the year...oh! wait, here comes ‘Warm Bodies’. It lost more than $100 million
dollars at the US box-office for Warners and sent poor Bryan Singer scuttling
back to the X-Men franchise with something to prove. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A Good Day To Die Hard</span></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Probably the biggest disappointment of the year – the
(almost) impeccable ‘Die Hard’ franchise was brought down faster and more devastatingly
than an exploding Chinook in this unbelievably dim and nonsensical sequel.
Everyone involved should be ashamed – except Jai Courtney ‘cos he’s HOT.</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-86178312035172950092014-01-05T13:02:00.000-08:002014-01-05T13:02:29.671-08:00<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>MY MOVIE YEAR - 2013 : THE FULL LIST</b></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2013 has been a fairly eventful year - if I had to make a comparison with any of this years big movie releases it would be 'Man of Steel'. Not because I spent most of the year in red panties and blue leggings, no, I draw this parallel because both started out showing great promise, before descending into a mind numbing, soul destroying mess of chaos and disappointment. Like the film's final coda, which involved the unveiling of Henry Cavill in full 'Clark Kent' get-up, my year also ended on a similarly fleeting, but decidedly more enjoyable, positive note. It's fair to say that the main plus point to being unemployed (unemployable?) is I did have plenty of spare time to see a lot more movies this year - I saw 127 different movies at the cinema (145 before removing multiple viewings) which, thanks to Cineworld's subscription service, works out at a saving of over £1,075 (thank you Unlimited Card - you are, and always will be, my 'Desert Island Discs' luxury item). I'll be posting my 'Best & Worst' lists a little later, but here for now, is the full list of movies I saw this year, in the order I saw them and with scores out of 10.</span><br />
<br />
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="border-collapse: collapse; width: 454px;">
<colgroup><col style="mso-width-alt: 13824; mso-width-source: userset; width: 284pt;" width="378"></col>
<col style="mso-width-alt: 2779; mso-width-source: userset; width: 57pt;" width="76"></col>
</colgroup><tbody>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl69" height="20" style="height: 15.0pt; width: 284pt;" width="378"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Film</span></b></td>
<td class="xl71" style="border-left: none; width: 57pt;" width="76"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Score</span></b></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Impossible</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jack Reacher</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Hobbit :
An Unexpected Journey : 3D : IMAX</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Quartet</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Les Miserable
IMAX</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gangster Squad</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Life Of
Pi </span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Django
Unchained</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Monsters Inc
3D</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Sessions</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lincoln</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Movie 43</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Flight</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Zero Dark
Thirty </span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Wreck It Ralph
3D</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hitchcock</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Warm Bodies</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This Is 40</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A Good Day To
Die Hard</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I Give It A
Year</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Brave</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cloud Atlas</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mama</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Stoker</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Arbitrage</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Side Effects</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oz : The Great
& Powerful (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Broken</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Paperboy</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Welcome To The
Punch</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maniac</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Incredible
Burt Wonderstone</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jack The Giant
Slayer (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Identity Thief</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Compliance</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">G.I. Joe :
Retaliation (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Trance</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Finding Nemo
(3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Host</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spring
Breakers</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In The House</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dark Skies</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oblivion
(IMAX)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Papadopoulos
& Sons</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jeff Wayne's
Musical Version Of 'War Of The Worlds'</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Olympus Has
Fallen</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Place
Beyond The Pines</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Evil Dead</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Good
Vibrations</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm So Excited</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Iron Man 3
(3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Look Of
Love</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dead Man Down</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Star Trek :
Into Darkness (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mud</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Great
Gatsby (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Hangover :
Part III</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Purge</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Stone
Roses : Made Of Stone</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Epic (2D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After Earth</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Byzantium</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Iceman</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Behind The
Candelabra</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Man Of Steel
(3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">World War Z
(3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Before
Midnight</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spike Island</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Bula Quo!</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Despicable Me
2 (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This Is The
End</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Now You See Me</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Bling Ring</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Pacific Rim
(IMAX 3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Frozen
Ground</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The World's
End</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Wolverine
(3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Blackfish</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Conjuring</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Only God
Forgives</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Heat</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Alan Partridge
: Alpha Papa</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Lone
Ranger</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Elysium - Zart
Vilag</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kick-Ass 2</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lovelace</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Way, Way
Back</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You're Next</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jurassic Park
3D (IMAX)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Diana (World
Premiere)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Riddick</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">About Time</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">NT Live : The
Audience</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rush</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One Direction
- This Is Us (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">White House
Down </span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Call</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Prisoners</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Blue Jasmine</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Girl Most
Likely</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Runner Runner</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sunshine On
Leith</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How I Live Now</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Captain
Phillips</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Romeo And
Juliet</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Le Week-end</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Enough Said</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The
Spectacular Now (LFF)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ender's Game</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thor : The
Dark World 3D</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Philomena</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gravity 3D
(IMAX)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Don Jon</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In Fear</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Butler</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Hunger
Games: Catching Fire (IMAX)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Parkland</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Saving Mr
Banks</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Carrie</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gone With The
Wind (2013 Remaster)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nebraska</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Frozen (3D)</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jackass
Presents: Bad Grandpa</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Hobbit:
The Desolation Of Smaug 3D</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kill Your
Darlings</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7.5</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All Is Lost</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8</span></td>
</tr>
<tr height="20" style="height: 15.0pt;">
<td class="xl66" height="20" style="border-top: none; height: 15.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Anchorman 2:
The Legend Continues</span></td>
<td class="xl68" style="border-left: none; border-top: none;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6</span></td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-15715746242550112452013-12-11T09:40:00.000-08:002013-12-11T09:40:56.105-08:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">'Cannes You Dig It?' </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In praise of ‘Seduced and
Abandoned’ a documentary by Alec Baldwin and James Toback.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p>T</o:p>his week I
watched <i>Seduced and Abandoned</i>, part of the HBO Documentary season running on
Sky Atlantic at the moment. Fronted by actor Alec Baldwin and screenwriter
James Toback, the film is a fascinating peak behind the curtain of the Cannes
Film Festival and acts as a ‘state of play’ snapshot of making movies in
Hollywood in 2013 and the film industry in general. Baldwin, with Toback in
tow, attends the festival for the first time under the pretence of rustling up
financial backing for an original script he intends to star in, while also
making a documentary film recording their efforts. Hitting countless brick
walls and encountering many of the film industries great and good ( past and
present) along the way, the film leaves you with the feeling that it’s a
miracle anything other than sequels and franchise movies ever gets made.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The pair’s idea to make a film set in Iraq that
mirrors the (literally) balls-out, non-commercial spirit of Bernardo Bertolucci’s <i>Last Tango In Paris</i> - with Baldwin subbing for Marlon Brando and <i>Scream</i> star Neve
Campbell as his female lead – is met with unanimous blank stares. Maybe these
guys have seen the bedroom scenes from Baldwin’s ‘bonking divorcee’ comedy, <i>It’s Complicated</i>, or are trying to save Campbell from a lifetime of therapy
and PTSD – or it could be they just think it sounds like a pretty terrible
idea! Aware of the necessity for foreign investors and the need to secure
overseas distribution and home entertainment rights upfront, Baldwin and Toback
are looking to raise approximately $15-$18 million to make their movie, but
based on the two actor’s ‘marquee value’ they are told that they will be lucky
to bag anything near that amount. Several unconnected foreign investors quote a
max budget of $4-$5 million with these stars attached and they suggest that
Baldwin should stick to what he knows – the idea for a submarine based comedy,
with lots of sex thrown in, featuring the star of <i>30 Rock</i> and <i>The Hunt for
Red October</i> is something that these guys can really get behind. It’s this
incredibly blinkered and unimaginative thinking that prevails and at that point
the first of several hard and fast rules surfaces – Money Follows Stars. The
only names that seem to be on anyone’s lips at this year’s Cannes are Jessica
Chastain and Ryan Gosling. With this in mind our pair of intrepid filmmakers
set up interviews with both these actors and pitch their idea. As you can
imagine it doesn’t exactly go down well, but both actors are gracious enough to
say they’d need to read the script before they signed on – I imagine a waste
paper bin with the words ‘In Tray’ printed on the side of it will be that
script’s final resting place. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Next stop is
trawling the adjacent marina for several lunch dates aboard the yachts of some
of the world’s wealthiest men. The impression you’re left with is - Billionaires
stay Billionaires because they like to keep a tight hold on their cash –
protecting their money with the quiet, steely determination of a 1970’s BBC TV
presenter sneaking into the auditions for <i>Bugsy Malone</i>.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This could
all be very depressing and leave you despairing where your next <i>Blue
Valentine</i>, <i>The Descendants</i> or <i>Before Midnight</i> is coming from, but our
hosts are suitable aware and bring a wry smirk of optimism to the proceedings. Baldwin
is quick to admit that, in terms of movies at least, his star power faded very
quickly first time around and his new-found success as a TV comedy actor is a
solid, if fleeting, platform from which to launch a second movie career. He
also acknowledges the shift in power away from Director towards Actor that has
occurred in recent years, stating that back in the late 80’s, in the hands of
Mike Nichol’s, his director in <i>Working Girl</i>, he was just “a spatula he used
to flip an omelette, I wasn’t the omelette...I was the salt that you might have
sprinkled on it”. He sums up his inability to maintain a high profile career as
follows, “The way you make it in this business is you have to become a real
selfish mother-fucker”. He’s not kidding! And if to prove a point, he hooks up
with Brett Ratner – the man who made his name directing the <i>Rush Hour</i> franchise and un-made his name by almost derailing the lucrative <i>X-Men</i> franchise with <i>Last Stand</i> and making dubiously sexist (and anti-gay) comments
ahead of his abortive attempt to produce the Oscar Ceremony in 2012 – talk about
making a target of your target audience.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As Baldwin
and Toback’s vision appears to be slipping further and further from their
grasp, the film takes several sideways glances at some of the most iconic films
in cinema history, offering up behind the scenes anecdotes and insights into
the making of <i>Goodfellas, Chinatown, The Pianist, The Godfather, Rosemary’s
Baby</i> and, of course, <i>Last Tango In Paris</i>. We are treated to interviews from
the likes of Roman Polanski, Martin Scorsese, Francis Ford-Coppola and James
Caan who reminisce about their experiences, the ever changing landscape of film
and the true Hollywood legends (including Robert Evans - subject of the OTHER
great Hollywood insider documentary, <i>The Kid Stays In The Picture</i> – well worth
a viewing if you can squeeze it in). </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the end
you are left with a fairly bleak picture of the major studios and the cinema
industry as it stands – no one actually thinks it’s any harder to make films
these days – in fact technological advancements and across the board access to
all manner of affordable camera equipment has made the process easier than ever
- but it is a hell-of-a-lot harder to rustle up the funding – it’s either $100 million
plus blockbusters, franchise pictures or re-makes or $5 million Indies and very
little inbetween. In an industry where senior executives are constantly looking
over their shoulders at the ‘next guy’ with THE HIT under his belt coming up
fast behind, where the wishes of the marketing executives and the projected sale
of home entertainment rights are considered long before a script has even been
written or a director hired, where everyone is fixated on ‘running the numbers’
and fearful of producing anything untested or with no in-built audience, It has
never been more difficult to raise the money to produce a mid-budget film based
on an original screenplay or anything like a unique, visionary concept. Ron
Meyer, President and COO of Universal Studios and co-founder of CAA (Creative
Artists Agency) sums it up perfectly, “In the Industry we make some shitty
movies and we make some great movies...the real problem in this business if you
make a great film that no-one goes to see, versus a bad film that everyone has
gone to see, the way you keep your job is you make that bad film...you don’t
get points for that good film.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Toback’s highlights
his fear that something remarkable and unrepeatable, the ‘auteur’ cinema of the
1960’s and 70’s, has withered and died with virtually no fanfare, aside from in
the memories of some of the directors and actors who participated in those ‘glory
days’, by quoting a poem, ‘Requiem’, by John Updike:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It came to me the other day:<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Were I to die, no one would say,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Oh, what a shame! So young, so full<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Of promise – depth unplumbable!”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Instead, a shrug and tearless eyes<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Will greet my overdue demise;<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The wide response will be, I know,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“I thought he died a while ago.”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For life’s shabby subterfuge,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And death is real, and dark, and huge.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The shock of it will register<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nowhere but where it will occur.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If nothing
else the film gives insight into a world that may have passed, but will always
remain in the work that was produced. What it fails to acknowledge is that fact
that outside the Hollywood system and within certain genre’s things are
different – ‘horror specialist’ Blumhouse Productions made their mark with <i>Paranormal
Activity</i>. This was a small budget film – made independently for $15,000 – that
grossed nearly $200 million dollars worldwide in 2009 when licensed for
distribution through a Hollywood studio, Paramount. The company has gone on, under
a strictly enforced ‘mission statement’ that caps budgets at the $10 million
mark - with most coming in at around $3-$5 million - to make consistently high
grossing horror genre films including <i>The Purge, Dark Skies</i> and <i>Sinister</i>. They have
chosen their market, realise the potential built into that market and cater for
it almost exclusively. Their ethos dictates that ‘the director is king’,
encouraging inventive filmmaking, out-of-the-box marketing and a promise that the
creative’s vision will be unaltered and remain free from ‘studio intervention’
if they stay under the afore-mentioned budget ceiling. They also attract
relatively big name’s and quality actors such as Ethan Hawke, Patrick Wilson
and Rose Byrne by offering them percentage of back-end gross over up-front
salaries – and when a movie makes over 130 times its budget, there’s plenty of ‘back-end’
to go around. Surely this model could be easily translated to fit films in any
genre and work inside the studio system. </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You would
hope the news that the independently produced, <i>Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa</i> had
passed the $100 million thresh-hold in the US this week would be a wake-up call.
This is a comedy with no big stars (sorry Johnny! but with all the will in the
world I can’t really bring myself to put you on the Hollywood A-list), with a price
tag which puts it neatly into that ‘twilight zone’, mid-range budget that has
been all but eradicated from our cinema screens. This little movie cost less
than $15 million to make and has so far out grossed some of this year’s biggest
studio turkeys at the domestic box-office, including <i>The Lone Ranger</i> (budget
$225 million), <i>Elysium</i> (budget $115 million), <i>White House Down</i> (budget $150
million ) and <i>Jack The Giant Slayer</i> (budget $ 185 million). Unfortunately,
with mega-budget sequels such as <i>Transformers: Age of Extinction</i> just around
the corner, it looks like we might have to wait a while for that Baldwin/Neve political
fuck-fest, <i>Last Tango In Baghdad</i>, to see the light of day...but put like
that, maybe that’s not such a bad thing!</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-60265469049022035592013-12-05T17:04:00.001-08:002013-12-06T02:33:46.881-08:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Khan You
Feel the Force? </b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Films of the
Year: </b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Star Trek:
Into Darkness </b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On its
initial release, I saw <i>Star Trek:
Into Darkness</i> three times at the cinema and scored it a more than solid
9/10. I described it as “an ‘everything-I-could-possibly-have-wanted’ Star Trek
movie”. I read several four star reviews and the team at the ‘Empire’ podcast
were gushing more than the competition winners whisked backstage at a One
Direction concert to meet the band. Then something weird happened. At the time
of the DVD/Blu-ray release, there seemed to be a lot of revisionist reviewing
going on. The film was suddenly dropping stars from its ratings faster than the
stars of <i>The Counsellor</i> were dropping
that film from the top of their CV’s. Where there had been endless praise for
the pacing and giddy excitement surrounding the casting (and subsequent
performance) of Benedict Cumberbatch, as well as uncontainable speculation
about whether or not he was or wasn’t Khan, now there was bitching about it
being too shallow, a post <i>Fifth Estate</i> Cumberbatch was experiencing a bit of a back-lash (a Batch-lash if you will) and suddenly he was ‘chewing the scenery’ - munching
the walls of his ‘Enterprise’ cell as if he was a Hollywood starlet the day
after her ‘Vanity Fair’ cover-shoot – and the revelation that Cumberbatch WAS in
fact Khan was seen as some sort of a ‘cop-out’ and ‘shitting all over the
memory of <i>Wrath of Khan’</i>! Make up
your mind guys! First you want it. Then you don’t! It’s Anne Heche and cock all
over again!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Seeing the
film again, I’m inclined to stick with my initial assessment. I liken the
experience of watching it in December, looking all the way back to its release
in May, as akin to the ‘space jump’, from the ‘Enterprise’ to the USS
Vengeance, undertaken by Kirk and Khan in the film. Like the mine-field of
debris and ‘space-junk’ that stands in their way, I can’t help but think of the
garbage I should have made more effort to avoid – yes! I’m looking at you <i>Wolverine, Man of Steel</i> and <i>After Earth</i>!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Any
criticism of the cast being too ‘pretty’ or lacking the depth of character of
any previous ‘Enterprise’ crew is easy to ignore. The 2009 <i>Star Trek</i> introduced Chris Pine as Captain James T. Kirk, Zachary
Quinto as Spock, Karl Urban as Dr ‘Bones’ McCoy, Simon Pegg as Scotty, Zoe
Saldana as Uhura, John Cho as Sulu and Anton Yelchin as Chekov – ‘pretty’ they may be, but they are also the
best ensemble cast this side of the Avengers being Ensembled...sorry I mean Assembled.
It’s the strength of these actors working individually and in different
groupings that really shines in <i>Into
Darkness</i>. Okay, some of them have less to do than would seem appropriate,
but they all get at least one moment to shine – Sulu’s “If you test me...you
will fail” threat as he takes the Captain’s chair, Scotty struggling to run,
end to end, in the massive cargo bay before delivering two great lines – “Captain,
this door is very wee” and “Are you Star Fleet or private security?” Uhura has
some great scenes with Spock – best of all being the ‘passive aggressive’ argument
on the way to Kronos and the subtlety of
the tiny, tortured cry she emits when Spock forcefully breaks Khan’s arm during
their final showdown in San Francisco – Chekov rescuing Kirk and Scotty with a
life-saving game of Monkey Barrel, Bones in the torpedo deactivation sequence
and in his dead-pan delivery of lines like, “Don’t be so melodramatic...You
were barely dead!” and most of all the bantering to-and-fro between Kirk and
Spock – best exemplified by the scene where they attempt to outrun the Klingon Warbirds
by flying their shuttle into a very small space between two buildings:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spock: If
you are suggesting that we utilise the passage between the approaching structures
- this ship will not fit. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kirk: We’ll
fit.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spock:
Captain, we will not fit.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kirk: I told
you we’d fit.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spock: I am
not sure that qualifies.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The deepening
friendship and mutual respect that acts as the glue to every Kirk/Spock related
<i>Star Trek</i> story is central to <i>Into Darkness</i> and acts as a believable touchstone
for the events of the film’s final coda. Don’t get me wrong, I still have
problems with that final act – following (but flipping) the final resolution to
<i>Wrath of Khan</i> is just the wrong side
of ‘affectionate referencing’ for me and I would have been happier if they’d
had the confidence in their audience to carry Kirk’s ‘resurrection’ over into
film No.3 - or at least end the film with a more subtle shot of the seemingly dead
Captain, closing in on his face as his eyes open – but to be honest, that’s a
small niggle in a mountain of large gold nuggets. Like Julie Andrews on a dark
and stormy night, I’m inclined to think about my favourite things – while Kirk’s
non-death might seem like a ‘bee sting’ or a ‘dog bite’, there are too many ‘whiskers
on kittens’ and ‘raindrops on roses’ to mention...but I’ll try:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The
pre-backlash Benedict Cumberbatch adds real weight to, what might be in another’s
hands, some fairly over-wrought dialogue – the first prison-cell scene is
pitch-perfect and his delivery of the “I will walk over your cold corpses to
recover my people” line is chilling and exhilarating in equal measure. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s in the
script department that <i>Into Darkness</i>
really sets itself apart. Aside from previously mentioned gems there are
numerous other grand-standing speeches and some very quotable lines, none more
so than this exchange between Spock and McCoy:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">McCoy: Tell
me this is going to work.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Spock: I
have neither the information nor the confidence to do so Doctor.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">McCoy: Boy,
you’re a real comfort.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There’s no
shortage of edge-of-your-seat set pieces either – The ‘cold opening’ / pre-credits
mission has JJ written all over it – he was pulling this stunt as far back as season
one of <i>Alias</i> and <i>Mission Impossible III</i> - The entire Kronos sequence bodes well for Episode
VII, riffing as it does on several key <i>Star
Wars</i> moments including the Millennium Falcon escape from the exploding
Death Star at the end of <i>The Return of
the Jedi </i>and the dog-fight escape from Mos Eisely in <i>Star Wars.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The
warp-speed chase between the ‘Enterprise’ and the ‘Vengeance’ is virtually
unparalleled in its dazzling visuals and, after the finale free-fall from space,
the ‘Enterprise’ rising through the clouds might be the ultimate <i>Star Trek</i> ‘money-shot’. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Best of all
is the aforementioned ‘space jump’ between the two Federation Starships - Exhilarating,
tense and a master-class in the use of special effects and sound-design. News
of this sequence must have elicited a few beads of cold sweat from Alfonso
Cuarón, the director of ‘Gravity’ - considering that his four-years-in-the
making, ‘ground-breaking’ and ‘uniquely innovative’ film’s plot hinges on a
lengthy sequence that involves his characters ‘space walking’ in a deadly
debris field as they try to escape from a destroyed space shuttle to the safety
of a nearby space station!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Aside from
the broader strokes – original series references including Tribbles and Nurse
Chapel – and that much talked about Alice Eve ‘underwear shot’ – in its
defence, aside from a similarly unnecessary shot of Kirk in his ‘tidy-whities’
earlier in the movie, there was a similar Uhura scene in the first film and
that kind of ‘titillation’ was definitely in keeping with the tone of the
original series – the film has some fun with its source material. I especially
like the transition shot that fades Scotty’s exclamation of “Holy Shit” with
the ‘Shhhh’ swishing sound of the opening door to the bridge of the ‘Enterprise’.
I also liked the squashing of the Alcatraz prison by the crash-landing ‘Vengeance’
– a sneaky “F –You” to the Fox Network for cancelling JJ’s ‘Alcatraz’ TV
series after one, 13 episode, season?</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All in all
it stands up to repeated viewing and I maintain that the <i>Star Wars</i> franchise couldn’t really be in safer hands. Now all he
has to do is steer clear of anything amphibian with questionably racist
undertones and avoid showing his lead actress in any gratuitous bikini shots -
because you’d never get THAT in a <i>Star
Wars</i> movie...oh! Wait a minute...Who’s that chained to Jabba’s throne? </span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-35950764893355562282013-10-01T14:37:00.001-07:002013-10-07T03:29:10.410-07:00<pre style="background-color: white;"><div style="color: #444444; line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Maybe You Can Teach An Old Dog New Tricks...</b></span></span></div>
<div style="color: #444444; line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>or 'how to write a love letter to your ex-employer'</b></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Yesterday I let something take place that I don't normally allow to happen...I let my usual care-free and sunny disposition slip...Okay! that's not what happened....oh! I really make myself laugh sometimes...which is just as well, 'cos I probably would've been in tears...in fact I was for a bit...</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
After I let something petty bring me down and upset me, I found myself writing an imaginary break-up letter to my former employer - you know the kind of thing I mean - the sort of letter you send after you've been apart for a while but you hope will either get you back together or split you up for good...just to fill anyone in who doesn't know me or anyone who has managed to let it slide that they do, in fact, know me...I worked for hmv for over twenty years. I lost my job earlier this year during their much publicised administration. I say lost...that suggests that it slipped through a hole in my pocket, or I let it roll under the sofa...no, I didn't lose it, it just wasn't there anymore. I went into work one day and a few hours later I went home unemployed...there was a rather distressing half hour meeting before that, but I'm pretty sure everyone read about that on Twitter at the time...</div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
My letter started out as a 'Dear John' that was addressed to me, but then I realised I really should let the whole company know how I feel...</div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i>Dear hmv,</i><br />
<i>I just wanted to drop you a note to say that I'm happy you are moving on, I'm even sort of happy that you've re-connected with a lot of your old friends - even the ones you said you didn't really like that much when we were still together - but I'm disappointed and upset that you think my opinions regarding how you choose to conduct yourself (past or present) are somehow disrespectful or unhelpful. I'm not bitter about how I was treated by you or towards the people who made the final decisions that were made, but I think I have every right to be. I also have the right to express my opinions and air my feelings on that subject...but I haven't...anywhere! I have, however, shown my ongoing loyalty to you by applying for several jobs within the company (but as yet I've not even been offered the chance to interview for any of the new positions that have opened up). Like J. J. Barrie in the 2nd greatest country song of all time - I'll tell anyone who'll listen that most of my time working for you was a pleasure and a privilege, not a duty - I worked long hours and didn't get paid for all of them. No Charge! I worked days off and cut short holidays. No Charge! I even let you make me redundant without actually giving me any notice what-so-ever. No Charge! The song ends with the line, 'The cost of real love is, no charge'. </i><i>I, as they say on every TV talent show, gave you 110%. </i><i>I wont insult you by saying it was all sunshine and unicorns...it wasn't. But like many former (& current) hmv employees, I did it because I loved it...not for financial reward...because I loved it. You, more than anyone, should know how devastating the last year has been for me. All I can say is I genuinely hope you never have to go through the same process again that I (& many of our mutual friends & colleagues) went through this year. It is heartbreaking to lose a job, but it's even harder to give up something that you believed was an integral part of your life. 'What about your redundancy?' I hear you say! Well if you think that's compensation for over twenty years work, you have a pretty weird idea of value for money or indeed the value of loyalty and hard work. No sum of money can compensate for the loss i have felt this year or soften the blow to anyone's self-esteem. As ever, I want to wish hmv every success, but I also want you to avoid making some of the same mistakes.</i></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i>Maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks...it must be better than letting it do all the old ones over and over again...</i></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i>I'll leave the last words on the subject to someone who knows how to express the feeling of loss and the promise of hope, a lot better than I ever could...</i></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i><b>Well, if it's so deep you don't think you can speak about it,</b></i><br />
<i><b>Don't ever think that you can't change the past and the future.</b></i></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i><b>You might not think so now,</b></i><br />
<i><b>But just you wait and see...someone will come to help you.</b></i></div>
<div style="line-height: 21px; text-align: justify; white-space: normal;">
<i>Kate Bush - Love & Anger</i></div>
<span style="line-height: 21px; white-space: normal;"><i><div style="text-align: justify;">
Yours always</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
A Former Employee </div>
</i></span></span></pre>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-72360667225215652932013-09-20T08:58:00.000-07:002013-12-05T08:36:10.987-08:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Coronation Street - 'Let's Get Ready To Crumble' </b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>or 'How Karl, literally, wiped the floor with Dev'</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Friday nights double ‘Coronation Street’ saw the dramatic
conclusion to the storyline that’s been simmering away on the back burner since
Karl Munro torched The Rovers back in March, leaving Sunita Alahan and Paul The
Fireman’s best mate, Random Firewoman Person, looking like the carbonised bread
crumbs lurking in that little drawer at the bottom of your toaster.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As soap luck would have it. the action unfolded on the very day that Karl had finally managed
to persuade the long suffering Stella to let him take her up the aisle – not as
painful as it sounds, their turbulent relationship has seen Stella show Karl
the (back) door on several occasions. (Apologies,
some ‘Carry On’ jokes seem to have spilled over from another article involving ‘Soap
Legend’ Barbra Windsor) .</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It’s fair to say that Karl (played by John <span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Michie)</span>
and Dev (played by <span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Jimmi Harkishin</span>) have very
different acting styles, in that Karl can and Dev really, really can’t...What
transpired was like watching a master-class – not in acting, more like in
joinery...Poor Karl. Dev’s acting is so wooden, what should have been a
National Soap Award grabbing showdown, turned out to be more like watching Karl
sweep the floor of The Rovers with a broom handle made up to look like Dev. Let’s be clear about this, John Michie isn't Scottish but he spent a good ten years convincingly rolling his ‘R’s around the streets of
Glasgow saying “Therrrrrre’s bin a murrrderrrr” in ‘Taggart’ before he reverted to a Manc drawl to join ‘The Street’ a couple of years back. Dev on
the other hand has relied on a style I like to call ‘gracious old lady acting’,
which involves him looking bashfully around whatever scene he is in, making no
eye contact with anyone and adding a camp flourish of upward intonation to
every line. Think a Bollywood Lady Bracknell meets Miss Bertha from ‘Acorn
Antiques’ and you’re almost there. The script writers saw a way out and, after
a few excruciating scenes where Dev seemed to be channelling Hannibal Lecter to
convey menace, they used the old
‘sh*t-actor-in-coma-during-dramatic-scenes’ ploy (first fully utilised during
their first ‘live’ episode when hospital bed-ridden Vera Duckworth slipped into
unconsciousness at the start of the episode, only to wake up just before the
credits rolled) by having Karl knock Dev out with an unfeasibly sturdy bottle
of whiskey applied briskly to the side of his head. Not that it was all Dev’s
fault. His delivery doesn’t help, but some of the lines he was given were so
obtuse and cryptic, I thought I was watching an Eric Cantona press conference.
“When the hot pot makes its journey to The Cabin, it’s because Audrey’s is
fully booked and the Bistro has run out of olives”. I’m not even going to go
into the story writing process that came up with Karl dragging hostage Stella
into the cellar – did they do it just ‘cos they liked the little rhyme? With
writing this poor, it’s no wonder Michelle Collins announced recently that, early next year, she is
leaving Weatherfield for good. Her screams of “If you’re going to
kill me, kill me” may just have been an adlibbed cry for help.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Highlights for me
included Jason Grimshaw manfully dragging the half conscious Dev out of the
warm, dry comfort of The Rovers bar floor and unceremoniously dropping him into
a massive puddle on the rain soaked cobbles outside the pub. To be fair, Jason
may have been distracted by Owen wearing an identical tight black t-shirt in
what might be the most surprising edition of ‘Fashion Police’s’ favourite game,
‘Bitch Stole My Look’.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Elsewhere in the episodes, Faye’s new BFF, Grace, revealed herself to be a member
of Weatherfield’s very own Bling Ring – if I was Cilla Black or Dale Winton,
I’d be making doubly sure the extension doors were locked before I headed out
to the ‘Stepping Out’ Live Finale in a couple of weeks time. And in a pathetic attempt to pull in younger
viewers, Corrie writers appeared to have Dev change his Facebook status to
‘nearly dead’ to alert the rest of The Street to his plight....Grace was later
seen tweeting #getsomeactinglessonsloser
</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now I did look away for a moment, but during the Karl V’s
Dev showdown I think ITV1 slipped in a cheeky trailer for their new dramatisation
of ‘The Simon Cowell Story’, all I heard was “Sinitta, Sinitta, Sinitta, change
the record pal. That woman never knew the meaning of love, or loyalty, or
self-respect for that matter”. I’ll definitely be tuning in for that. </span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The whole episode made me crave for the good old days when
‘Eastenders’ was in its heyday (post Mary The Punk, pre Moon’s) when they
revelled in the opportunity to pull out ‘The Two Hander’ - two characters
stretching out over the entire running time of the episode and acting, ACTING, <span style="line-height: 115%;">ACTING</span>! Whether it was Den and Ange, or Dot and that
woman who now plays one of the old women in the Wonga.com ads (previous roles
include knitting ‘Shreddies’ – have you tasted them? They're definitely made out of wool). The sad thing is, ‘Coronation Street’ has the talent.
Who wouldn’t want to watch a full half hour of Roy and Hayley come to terms
with her current, heartbreaking, story-line, or Leanne and Carla spending 22
minutes explaining to us all what it is that they see in Peter ‘Whiskey Sour’
Barlow. The nearest ‘Corrie’ gets to a ‘Two Hander’ these days, is Eva’s ample chest...described by Karl’s
Best Man ,Tez, in the best line of the episode, as looking like a “dead heat in
a zeppelin race”.</span></div>
</div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-42561203040234475172013-08-25T17:04:00.001-07:002013-10-01T14:06:26.872-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Why ‘The Bake Off’ team should
learn a thing or two from Kick Ass and Hit Girl.</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I almost didn’t go to
see ‘Kick Ass 2’ this week. The reviews have been largely negative, with many heralding
the return of the ‘Piss Poor Sequel’. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The law of diminishing
returns argument, cemented by seventies franchises like ‘Jaws’ ‘Superman’ and
the 1990’s incarnation of ‘Batman’, has been on shaky ground in the past few
years. Creative quality drops have not necessarily resulted in corresponding
box office declines. Outside the horror genre, where creative quality control
might be considered less important (and in the case of the ‘Saw’ franchise – an
alien concept), the pressure to deliver ‘bigger and better’ has meant that
budgets have gone up, while the press reactions have generally gotten worse. Big
budget franchises such as ‘Iron Man’, ‘Sherlock Holmes’, ‘Pirates of the
Caribbean’ and ‘Transformers’ continue to deliver review-proof box office
numbers, despite the general consensus that as the title pre-fix numbers go up,
the movies get steadily worse. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Like its titular main
character ‘Kick Ass’ was a seven stone weakling in comparison to the bulked up
superhero competition (‘Iron Man 2’, ‘Thor’, ‘Captain America’ and ‘X-Men:
First Class’) kicking sand in his face at the box office in 2010/11. But his
special powers were pretty simple: he obviously wasn’t real, but, to his target
audience, he was pretty relatable. The beating that ‘Kick Ass 2’ has been dealt
by movie reviewers in the dark alleyways of the British Press, have focused on
the fact that it’s impossible to capture that ‘lightening-in-a-bottle’
freshness and originality twice. So how do you solve a problem like Hit Girl
growing up? I say - Let her! Despite an almost complete overhaul of the key
creative team, the sequel successfully re-captured the frantic pace, and
knowing ‘geek-friendly’ tone of the original, dropping its fair share of F (and
C) Bombs along the way, but allowing its narrative and main characters to
develop in a satisfying manner. I believed the story arcs in this movie more
than those on display in recent clunk-fests ‘The Wolverine’ and ‘Man of Steel’.
Not everything works, but the original didn’t hit bullseye with every ninja
star either. ‘Kick Ass’ definitely set out to shock with a (then) thirteen year
old Chloe Grace Moretz using the ‘C’ word in one of her introductory scenes,
but I’m not sure that I believe in rape
jokes being played for laughs or fifteen year old girls being forced to watch
Union J videos unprotected, But I can believe that there are just as many
heinous crimes being committed by gangs of Kardashian inspired Mean Girls in
the high school gymnasiums of middle America as there are by organised crime
gangs in downtown L.A. and I’m happy to watch Hit Girl give those Heathers a
good poke with her ‘Sick Stick’. I’m glad they made a sequel and I’d happily
give round three a shot, but I fear I may be kicking that ass on my own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Also returning this week,
following a similarly tried and tested formula, was ‘The Great British Bake
Off’. Series four kicked off with an equally shocking barrage of C-words...it
was ‘Cake this’ and ‘Cake that’ for the full hours running time! Mary Berry and
Paul Hollywood held court over a new batch of inductees, a baker’s dozen no
less, who will endeavour to serve up a cornucopia of baked delights over the
next few months.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The ‘Bake Off’ franchise
may be proving a little more robust than ‘Kick Ass’, but I for one would love
to see it branch out a bit, exploit different revenue streams and get a bit
more creative with its merchandise. Maybe a graphic novel where Mary (Superhero
alter-ego – Fondant Fancy) and Paul (aka Bread Reckoning) recruit their own
crime-fighting team, ‘Bakers League of Britain’, is a little too far-fetched. But
who wouldn’t want to see Paul face off against a retired Civil Servant (‘I’d
bake 24/7 but I’m a slave to Foccacia, my King Charles / Border Collie cross’) with
the battle cry ‘You’ll be sprinkling your Pumpernickel with your own nut-flour if
I don’t see a healthy rise’ or Mary telling some sad-sack amateur baker / nursery
school teacher to ‘shove her wet ingredients up her muffin pans’ in wonderful,
full colour illustrations. Maybe I'm on my own for that one too...</span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-4328420191939686152013-08-12T06:04:00.002-07:002016-11-18T04:55:51.357-08:00<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>The Top 50 Best 12” Singles of the 80’s (Stewart Allan Extended Remix)</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;">Inspired by the recent article in Classic Pop Magazine:
Issue No.6, where, after a fraught vinyl fuelled lock-in session with several
key contributors, a countdown of the Top 50 Best 12” Singles of the 80’s was
finally completed. As soon as I found out their list, I started thinking about
my own. To my surprise only one track featured in both our Top 50’s – John
‘Tokes’ Potoker’s ‘Sussudio’ remix for Phil Collins. To avoid cries of
plagiarism, I swapped it out for my 51st favourite 12” instead. Hope you enjoy
reading the list as much as I’ve enjoyed compiling it...I’ve shown you mine,
now you show me yours...</span></div>
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<b>50 – Morgan McVey – Looking Good Diving With The Wild Bunch
(feat. Neneh Cherry) (12” Mix) (Remixed by The Wild Bunch – 4.10)</b></div>
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The first 12” on my list has such a complicated family tree
it probably deserves its own episode of ‘Who Do You Think You Are?’ Ok, here
goes...deep breath...a manufactured pop duo comprising of Jamie Morgan and
Cameron Mcvey, with links to the UK Buffalo fashion scene, release ‘Looking
Good Diving’, a throw away pop/dance track produced by Stock Aitken Waterman.
It disappears without trace, but this B-side, featuring a then unknown Neneh
Cherry and re-titled ‘Looking Good Diving With The Wild Bunch’, is a
ground-breaking remix by The Wild Bunch (a Bristol based collective of trip hop
musicians and DJ’s including Massive Attack’s, Mushroom). This remix would, in
turn, be remixed and remodelled by Bomb The Bass’ Tim Simenon to become the
basis for ‘Buffalo Stance’, Neneh Cherry’s breakthrough No.3 single from 1988.
Cameron Mcvey went on to produce Massive Attack’s ‘Blue Lines’, All Saints’
eponymous debut and two albums by, two different incarnations of, The
Sugababes.</div>
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<b>49 – Dollar – Hand Held In Black And White (Extended
Version) (Mixed by Trevor Horn – 5.05)</b></div>
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The first of several Trevor Horn related 12”s on my list.
Pop duo David Van Day and Thereza Bazar had a whole other career in the late
1970’s, firstly as part of Guys and Dolls, and then latterly as Dollar. Hits
such as ‘Who Were You With In The Moonlight’ and ‘Shooting Star’ were squeaky
clean, MOR, radio fodder that placed them neatly alongside Brotherhood of Man
and The Nolans at the church hall disco. Horn masterminded a pure pop
resurrection that saw the band transformed into something so manufactured they
probably should have changed their names to Barbie and Ken. ‘Hand Held In Black
& White’ is included here, not only for its perfect pop credentials, but
also for the fact that it was pressed on a white vinyl 12” with an oversized
picture label.</div>
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<b>48 – Paul Young – Come Back And Stay (12” Version) (Remixed
by Laurie Latham – 7.31)</b></div>
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‘Wherever I Lay My Hat’ sat atop the UK singles chart for
three weeks in the summer of 1983 and it would kickstart a decade long string
of UK and US chart hits for Paul and his regular band of musicians. This
follow-up single, written by Jack Lee (who’s most famous composition, ‘Hanging
On The Telephone’, had been covered by Blondie, providing them with a Top 5 hit
in 1978) best exemplifies the quirky covers and chaotic productions that turned
the ‘No Parlez’ album into a multi-platinum success. This remix is firmly dated
in the 80’s thanks to the trademarked Pino Palladino bass sound and distinctive
Laurie Latham production.</div>
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<b>47 – Monsoon – Ever So Lonely (12” Version) (Mixed by Hugh
Jones and Steve Coe – 6.20)</b></div>
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The mix of contemporary UK dance flavours and traditional
Indian musicians proved to be an enticing, exotic novelty and delivered a No.12
hit for backroom production wizard Steve Coe and vocalist Sheila Chandra in
April 1982. Chandra would continue to plough her world music furrow for decades
to come, recording several credible and critically acclaimed albums for Peter
Gabriel’s Real World label.</div>
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<b>46 – Janet Jackson – The Pleasure Principle (Long Vocal 12”
Remix) (Remixed by Shep Pettibone – 7.27)</b></div>
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Released as the twenty third single from the ‘Control’ album
(only another ten or so to go), ‘The Pleasure Principle’ was given several
remixes by, man of the moment, Shep Pettibone. It kicks off with a cheeky
cut-up vocal sample of Janet’s ‘I’ll Be Worth The Wait’ tease from ‘Let’s Wait
Awhile’ (the twenty second single from<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>the ‘Control’ album) and mirrors his electro pulse tinged remixes for
the likes of Madonna’s ‘Express Yourself’ and Kim Wilde’s ‘You Came’.</div>
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<b>45 – OMD – If You Leave (Extended Version) (Mixed by Tom
Lord Alge – 6.04)</b></div>
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A much bigger hit in the US than the UK (No.48 here, No.4
over there) after it featured in the climactic scenes of John Hughes’ ‘Pretty
In Pink. It has since attained ‘cult’ status, becoming as synonymous with the
decade as Simple Minds’ ‘(Don’t You) Forget About Me’ (which had topped the US
charts the previous year after featuring in ‘The Breakfast Club’) slipping so
completely into American pop culture that it now acts as an instant eighties
nostalgia trigger. It was also the song that was actually playing when ‘Modern
Family’s’ Phil and Claire Dunphy first got together at their high school prom
(rather than Claire misremembering it as ‘True’ by Spandau Ballet<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>– apologies to Izzy Lafontaine).</div>
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<b>44 – Spandau Ballet – I’ll Fly For You (12” Glide Mix)
(Mixed by Tony Swain, Steve Jolley and Spandau Ballet – 7.13)</b></div>
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The third single from their ‘Parade’ album, ‘I’ll Fly For
You’ is given a radical remix in the form of this breezy, prototype chill-out
mix by Swain and Jolley. Stripping away virtually all the original
instrumentation, replacing it with a laid back, shimmering groove and half
whispered, half sung vocals.</div>
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<b>43 – Fine Young Cannibals – Good Thing (Nothing Like The
Single Mix) (Mixed by Fine Young Cannibals – 4.38)</b></div>
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Riding high on the wave of success created by ‘She Drives Me
Crazy’ and its parent album ‘The Raw and the Cooked’, the Birmingham
three-piece released ‘Good Thing’ as the second single from the project. Like
its predecessor, It would reach No.1 on the US Billboard Hot 100. This remix
does exactly what it says on the tin and throws away most of the album versions
exuberant, pseudo 60’s, rockabilly vibe and drags it kicking and screaming, all
the way to Madchester. Applying the same rhythmic shuffle that would come to
epitomise The Stone Roses sound – their eponymous debut was released in the
very same month as this remix – the track is given a far more contemporary and
cutting edge feel.</div>
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<b>42 – Stephen ‘Tin Tin’ Duffy – Kiss Me (Original 12”
Version) (Remixed by Francois Kevorkian – 7.28)</b></div>
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This mix of ‘Kiss Me’ pre-dates, by a couple of years, the
J.J. Jeczalik mix that delivered a Top 5 hit in March 1985. Mixed by Francois
Kevorkian, it was an anomalously massive underground club hit in the Midlands
in 1983 (no really!) It has the same hypnotic groove as Steve Hurley’s ‘Jack
Your Body’ and some really cool vocal outtakes where Mr Duffy fails to hit the
required high notes and trails off in groans of frustration.</div>
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<b>41 – Act – Snobbery And Decay (Extended, For Stephanie
Beecham) (Mixed by Stephen Lipson – 8.36)</b></div>
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Not adverse to the multiple remix release strategy much
favoured by their ZTT label-mates, Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Claudia Brucken
and Thomas Leer’s Act, released a handful of different 12” remixes to promote
their ‘Snobbery and Decay’ debut. This Stephen Lipson mix adds an air of
frantic urgency to his already over-the-top, everything but the orchestral
kitchen-sink, production.</div>
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<b>40 – Daryl Hall and John Oates – Out Of Touch (12” Mix)
(Remixed by Arthur Baker – 7.36)</b></div>
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This first single from Hall and Oates’ ‘Big Bam Boom’ album
failed to break the UK Top 40, stalling at No.48, but it was a different story
in the US, where the song hit No.1 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1984. This
Arthur Baker remix is a masterclass in turning a slice of white soul-boy
soft-rock into a dancefloor monster – see also his work with Fleetwood Mac,
Cyndi Lauper & Bruce Springsteen during the same period.</div>
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<b>39 – Culture Club – It’s A Miracle / Miss Me Blind (US 12”
Mix) (Remixed by Steve Levine – 9.08)</b></div>
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Considered something of a novelty at the time, this
ground-breaking if somewhat clumsy, mash-up of two tracks from Culture Club’s
‘Colour By Numbers’ album, was a massive US club hit in 1984. Clocking in at
over nine minutes long, it’s almost as long as Boy George’s entire period of
popularity in America. Too cruel?</div>
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<b>38 – Billy Idol – Flesh For Fantasy (Below The Belt 12” Mix)
(Remixed by Gary Langan – 7.00)</b></div>
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Becoming the closest thing to a genuine punk-rock superstar
(in the US at least) with his ‘Rebel Yell’ album and its subsequent singles,
Billy Idol delivered a surprisingly innovative batch of 12” mixes between ’82
and ’88. This mix of ‘Flesh For Fantasy’ has it all – layers of crushing guitar
riffs, hip-hop infused drum track and the same sexy swagger on display in INX’s
‘Need You Tonight’ - while keeping one (heavily made-up) eye on the goth-disco
dancefloor .</div>
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<b>37 – ABC – Vanity Kills (Abigail’s Party Mix) (Remixed by
Martyn Webster – 5.10)</b></div>
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First of two ABC tracks from their ‘How To Be A Zillionaire’
album to make my list, This Martyn Webster remix further explores the sonic
soundscape, so heavily influenced by Shannon’s ‘Let The Music Play’, that
informs the whole album and peppers it with some well chosen dialogue samples from
Mike Leigh’s gloriously camp, 70’s kitsch-fest, ‘Abigail’s Party’. ‘I promise
you Ange, you’re gonna see the difference’.</div>
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<b>36 – New Order - Fine Time (Silk Mix) (Remixed by Steve
‘Silk’ Hurley – 6.18)</b></div>
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As the lead single from their ‘Technique’ album, ‘Fine Time’
would receive an unlikely (and probably unwanted) accolade from PWL Hit Factory
boss Pete Waterman. He declared it his favourite single of 1988, stating that
it was one of the only records (besides his own presumably) that sounded
completely contemporary and obviously recorded using the most up to date studio
equipment available at the time. He wasn’t wrong. This Steve Hurley mix has a
scuttering, restless, nervous energy, sinister pervy vocal snippets and ends
with a flock of bleating sheep (presumably out on the ‘lamb’).</div>
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<b>35 – Pet Shop Boys (feat. Dusty Springfield) – What Have I
Done To Deserve This (Disco Mix) (Remixed by Shep Pettibone – 8.06)</b></div>
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First of two Pet Shop Boys tracks on my list. This remix of
their 1987 collaboration with Dusty Springfield, discards most of the originals
breezy, faux 60’s, swagger and turns up the BPM. Utilising, to great effect,
every hi-energy cliché under the sun, from cowbells to the cheesiest synth
hooks this side of The Boys Town Gang, Evelyn Thomas and Taffy.</div>
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<b>34 – Bomb The Bass (feat. Lauraine) – Don’t Make Me Wait
(12” Version) (Mixed by Tim Simenon and Pascal Gabriel – 6.35)</b></div>
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Tim Simenon had made his name creating cutting edge, sound
collage dance tracks using hip hop beats and stolen samples, but he was
desperate to be seen as more than a one trick pony DJ / Producer. His debut
album is a patchwork of styles and includes a cover of the Bacharach and David
standard ‘Say A Little Prayer’, as well as self-written tracks such as ‘Don’t
Make Me Wait’. This remix perfectly exemplifies the adrenalin rush sound-clash
of UK underground dance music and New York Hip Hop that would mark the
beginning of DJ Culture and would see the likes of Fatboy Slim and The Chemical
Brothers filling stadiums within a couple of years.</div>
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<b>33 – Shannon – Let The Music Play (Original 12” Mix) (Mixed
by Chris Barbosa and Nelson Cruz - 6.03)</b></div>
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Coming a good six years after Donna Summer’s ‘I Feel Love’ ,
this robotic, techno infused, hip-hop dance track with soaring, soulful female
vocals, may not seem like anything particularly original, but the addition of a
relentless, clattering drum track, some seriously frisky percussion and crazy
synth melody ad-libs, turned this into a massively influential cross-over pop
hit.</div>
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<b>32 – The Adventures – Feel The Raindrops (Extended Remix)
(Remixed by Paul Hardcastle<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 4.45)</b></div>
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Condemned by many to the bottom of the U2 wannabe barrel,
The Adventures have been lumped in with the likes of Then Jericho, The Alarm
and T’Pau as 80’s Stadium Rock God Also-rans. But their debut album shows a
tiny spark of potential that was almost, but not quite, reached. This unlikely
remix, by their Chrysalis label mate Paul Hardcastle, gives the track a much
brighter, more contemporary sparkle, adding a wonderfully uplifting middle
section featuring an exposed, throbbing bass line, over laid with cut-up vocal
samples.</div>
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<b>31 – The Psychedelic Furs – Heartbeat (New York Mix) (Mixed
by Keith Forsey and The Psychedelic Furs - 8.09)</b></div>
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Originally released as the B-side to the ‘Heaven’ single
(the first track released from the ‘Mirror Moves’ album), this pumping pop/rock
track later gained a solo re-release, and is now thought of as one of The Furs
finest singles. This schizophrenic, frantic remix veers from gothic pomp to
pure pop, with its PWL-style rolling synth drums, stuttering vocal cut-ups and
‘honking’ synthetic brass stabs.</div>
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<b>30 – Scritti Politti – Absolute (12” Version) (Remixed by
Gary Langan<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 6.11)</b></div>
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A dream come true opportunity to work with Arif Mardin in
New York delivered some career highlights for Green Gartside and informed the
overall sound of the ‘Cupid And Psyche 85’ album. This mix of ‘Absolute’, the
second single from the album, begins with Gartside playfully asks ‘What do you
want to hear the B-side for?’, before Gary Langan serves up a suitably cutting
edge, tough and funky, mash of fairlight vocal samples, crashing drums and
stuttering cut-ups.</div>
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<b>29 – Propaganda – p.Machinery (p.Polish Mix) (Remixed by Bob
Kraushaar<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 9.23)</b></div>
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Paul Morley and Trevor Horn’s experiment to create their own
dark and twisted version of Abba, resulted in what many consider one of the
best (and largely unappreciated) albums of the 80’s, Propaganda’s debut ‘A
Secret Wish’. This version of the third single from the album starts with the
sound of an old fashioned computer ‘dial-up’ and then builds, in typical House
Of ZTT fashion, to a blistering, bombastic conclusion.</div>
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<b>28 – Pet Shop Boys - Suburbia (The Full Horror) (Remixed by
Julian Mendelsohn<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 8.55)</b></div>
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This was only the Pet Shop Boys fourth hit single, yet they
already sound masterfully confident and gleefully willing to experiment. The
‘full horror’ mix by Julian Mendelsohn begins with the ominous sound of
snarling dogs and is littered with a cacophony of explosions, breaking glass
and some pretty catchy piano hooks.</div>
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<b>27 – A-Ha – I’ve Been Losing You (12” Extended Mix) (Remixed
by John ‘Jellybean’ Benitez<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 7.01)</b></div>
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When, on its third release, ‘Take On Me’ finally became the
bands dream ticket to an international break-through, A-ha were keen to
capitalise on their hard found success and promptly headed out on an enormous
world tour to promote the ‘Hunting High and Low’ album. Equally anxious to
maintain this momentum in their recorded output, they started recording the
follow-up on the road, demoing in portable studios and recording whenever, and
wherever they could. ‘Scoundrel Days’ is a patchy affair, but contains some of
the bands best work in tracks such as ‘Weight Of The Wind’, ‘The Swing Of
Things and the epic<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>title track (as well
as the hits singles ‘Manhattan Skyline’ and ‘Cry Wolf’). Best of all is this
first single from the album, pre-dating ‘The Living Daylights’ by a year, but
sounding every inch the Bond theme, with its brass stabs, nervy percussion and
dramatic false ending. This Jellybean mix turns up the groove and pushes the
rhythm track to the front of the mix.</div>
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<b>26 – Freeez - I.O.U. (Mega-Mix 12") (Remixed by John
‘Jellybean’ Benitez and John Robie<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>-
8.38)</b></div>
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This unlikely collaboration between a white jazz-funk outfit
from London and Arthur Baker, the pioneering producer behind Hip Hop label
Tommy Boy Records (including ground-breaking tracks by Afrika Bambaataa and
Soul Sonic Force), would become one of the most influential dance/pop records
of the 80’s, reaching No.2 on the UK singles chart and hitting No.1 on US Club
charts in June 1983. The exhilarating mix of falsetto vocals, frantic hip hop
beats and crazy fairlight vocal cut-ups still sounds incredibly fresh thirty
years on.</div>
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<b>25 – Ultravox – We Came To Dance (Extended Version) (Mixed
by Geoff Emerick - 7.38)</b></div>
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This was the fourth Top 20 single released from the bands
‘Quartet’ album. Rather surprisingly, the album was produced by George Martin
and accordingly, has a much warmer, more analogue, feel in comparison to their
previous albums. This mix by Geoff Emerick strips away most of the vocal and
instrumentation, and with nods to Giorgio Moroder and Kraftwerk, replaces them
with a relentless, monotonous, hypnotic bass line and washes of icy synthesizer
lines.</div>
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<b>24 – Bryan Ferry – Slave To Love (Special 12” Re-Mix)
(Remixed by Bob Clearmountain<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 5.56)</b></div>
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The Roxy Music front-man was enjoying a massive resurgence
of commercial success with his sixth solo album, ‘Boys & Girls’ (his first
in seven years). Stylistically similar and exuding the same brand of cool
sophistication as the last Roxy Music album, ‘Avalon’, ‘Slave To Love’ was a Top
10 single in 1985. This extended mix by Bob Clearmountain starts with a crash
of thunder before giving way to a languid and atmospheric Daniel Lanois-esque
ambience.</div>
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<b>23 – Soft Cell – Torch (12” Extended Version) (Mixed by Mike
Thorne - 8.27)</b></div>
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First of two 12” singles by Marc Almond and Dave Ball on the
list. Like the majority of the extended mixes produced by the band, this
features some completely new verses and an extended middle section. Here we get
a sung/spoken conversation between besotted fan Marc, declaring his undying
love to the jaded and indifferent torch singing Diva, as voiced by Cindy
Ecstasy – so let’s recap – that’s the opening gay front-man trying to seduce
the tone deaf female singer, who just happened to be the bands drug dealer at
the time (allegedly).</div>
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<b>22 – Echo & The Bunnymen – Never Stop (Discotheque)
(Mixed by David Balfe and The Bunnymen - 4.45)</b></div>
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With a slightly uncomfortable nod to the emerging
electro-rock genre, as epitomised by New Order and their work with Arthur Baker
and John Robie, this non-album single proved to be an interesting, if swiftly
abandoned, experiment. Sequenced synthesiser lines, staccato strings, U2-esque
guitar riffs and a killer xylophone hook...only in the 80’s!</div>
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<b>21 – Sybil – My Love Is Guaranteed (PWL Pump Up The Volume
12” Mix) (Remixed by Phil Harding<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>-
7.38)</b></div>
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At the height of their success, the PWL Hit Factory team
would release multiple 12” remixes for every release. The turnaround on these
mixes was so fast that they were often able to ‘tip their hats’ to the big club
hits of that particular moment. The logic being that DJ’s would mix their
records with the ‘cooler’ club tracks and increase their exposure. This ‘Pump
Up The Volume’ mix of Sybil’s No.47 hit from August 1987 is a perfect example
of this. Mimicking M/A/R/R/S massive No.1 ‘Pump Up The Volume’ to great effect,
It also served as a cheeky two fingered salute from Pete Waterman to the
M/A/R/R/S collective, to go with the court injunction he had already served to
limit the songs International release, following the discovery, within the
track, of an unauthorised sample from the SAW team’s ‘Roadblock’ single.</div>
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<b>20 – Depeche Mode – Just Can’t Get Enough (Schizo Mix)
(Remixed by Daniel Miller and Depeche Mode - 6.46)</b></div>
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With only their second hit single Depeche Mode were already
keen to prove that they were more than just a boy band who played synthesisers.
This ‘Schizo’ mix of ‘Just Can’t Get Enough’ strips away the pure pop
exhilaration of the original and drops down into extended Kraftwerk-esque instrumental
passages that transform the track into a hypnotic electro classic.</div>
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<b>19 – ABC – Be Near Me (Munich Disco Mix) (Remixed by Martyn
Webster - 4.58)</b></div>
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Following the commercial success of 1982’s seminal ‘Lexicon
Of Love’ was proving to be an on-going nightmare for Martin Fry and Mark White.
By the spring of 1985 they were still searching for that all important
follow-up Top 10 hit. The first single from their forthcoming ‘How To Be A
Zillionaire’ album (‘How To Be A Millionaire’) had stalled at No.49. Many
assumed that its fashion-forward mix of bright electro beats, nods to Shannon’s
‘Let The Music Play’ and cartoon imagery was too much of a leap for their
fanbase. ‘Be Near Me’ definitely had more in common with the lush orchestration
and swooning balladry of their biggest hits, but it too failed to break the UK
Top 20.This Mark Webster remix strips away all traces of the aforementioned
orchestration and lays out a blistering mix of bombastic drums, Chic inspired
sweeping strings, funky guitar licks and a relentless ‘That’s Right’ vocal
chant.</div>
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<b>18 – Heaven 17 – Let Me Go (Extended Mix) (Mixed by B.E.F.
and Greg Walsh - 6.20)</b></div>
<b>
</b><br />
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Released as the first single from ‘The Luxury Gap’ and
following a period of growing critical acclaim, ‘Let Me Go’ unexpectedly failed
to break the UK Top 40, stalling at No.41 in October 1982. A curious mix of
film-score chic and the white-boy funk / soul that had infused the ‘Penthouse
and Pavements’ album, it stands as the creative bridge between cult success and
the eventual commercial breakthrough they experienced with their next release,
‘Temptation’ (No.2 in April 1983).</div>
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<b>17 – Visage – Visage (Original 12” Dance Mix) (Mixed by
Midge Ure & Visage - 6.01)</b></div>
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This was the third hit from the eponymous debut album and
perfectly exemplifies the euro-cool club mixes that the band had become
synonymous with. Built purely to fill the dancefloors of underground New
Romantic clubs and reflecting everything that was cool about the Blitz scene –
outlandish fashion and make-up, the towering influence of Bowie and, obviously,
chucking in a few lyrics in French.</div>
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<b>16 – Yazoo – Nobody’s Diary (Extended Mix) (Mix by Eric
Radcliffe - 6.08) / State Farm (Extended Mix) (Mix by Eric Radcliffe - 6.36)</b></div>
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The first double ‘A’ side entry to my list. By May 1983,
Vince Clarke and Alison Moyet were nearing the end of their short, and highly
successful, time together. Within a matter of months the band would release
their second album (‘You & Me Both’ - No.1 in July 1983) and then promptly
split up. This would be the last single released before Yazoo called it a day.
‘Nobody’s Diary’ is a poignant pop track written by Alison Moyet, while the
B-side, ‘State Farm’, sees the duo returning to ‘Situation’ territory, to
deliver another impossibly credible underground club track. Featuring an
improbably infectious groove (considering it is the creation of a group of
pasty white synth boffins from Basildon) and made complete by Moyet’s insanely
funky vocal grunts and chants.</div>
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<b>15 – Sonia – You’ll Never Stop Me Loving You (XXX Kiss Mix)
(Remixed by Phil Harding<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 8.06)</b></div>
<b>
</b><br />
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Another of the SAW/PWL teams ‘sound-alike’ remixes. This
time Sonia’s debut, No.1 single is given the Lil’ Louis treatment. ‘French
Kiss’ was THE biggest record to break-out from the underground club scene for
years and, here, Phil Harding declares his undying love and admiration for the
track by re-creating the hypnotic instrumental and laying Sonia’s vocal on top.
The effect is to turn the pure pop declaration of teen-love into something
altogether more sinister and unnerving. My only criticism - perhaps we didn’t
really need the re-created orgasmic screams from Sonia (who had just turned
eighteen at the time).</div>
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<b>14 – Elton John – I Don’t Wanna Go On With You Like That
(Pettibone 12” Mix) (Remixed by Shep Pettibone - 7.15)</b></div>
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1988 saw Elton enjoying an extended period of commercial
indifference in the UK. Aside from an anomalous re-issue of ‘Candle In The
Wind’ reaching No.5 in January, he hadn’t scored a UK Top 10 single since
‘Nikita’ in 1985. Things were looking a lot rosier in the US. His perceived
comeback album, ‘Reg Strikes Back’, hit No.16 on the US Billboard Chart (two
places higher than in the UK) and the single ‘I Don’t Wanna Go On With You Like
That’, reached No.2 on The Hot 100 (an improvement on its UK No.30 chart
placing). This remix by Shep Pettibone transforms the song into a hi-energy
dancefloor monster, with extended piano riffs and orchestral stabs, ending with
a bemused Elton proclaiming ‘That was brilliant, what was that?’</div>
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<b>13 – Blancmange<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>-
Game Above My Head (Long Version) (Mixed by John Owen Williams and Blancmange -
7.14)</b></div>
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This is the second B-side on my list. Originally released in
this ‘long version’ as the flip-side to the 12” release of ‘Waves’ (the fourth
and final single released from the band’s debut album ‘Happy Families’). More
stripped down and purely ‘electronic’ than most of their songs, but sharing the
faintly middle eastern rhythms of their biggest hit ‘Living On The Ceiling’,
this is by far the bands most interesting and experimental commercial release,
pointing perhaps, to a creative road not taken.</div>
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<b>12 – Kate Bush – Hounds Of Love (Alternative 12” Version)
(Re-produced by Kate Bush - 3.48)</b></div>
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This 12” version is a unique addition to the list, clocking
in at a mere forty five seconds longer than the original album version, but
having been completely re-recorded for the 12” format. Leaving the pounding
drum track intact and adding sawing strings and a simplified, almost
live/one-take vocal, Kate strips back the majority of the original elements of
the song to deliver a much more concise and minimalist mix. As such, it acts as
a precursor to her ‘Directors Cut’ re-recording project released over twenty
five years later.</div>
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<b>11 – The Lover Speaks – Every Lovers Sign (New York Mix)
(Remixed by Andy Wallace and Bruce Forest - 5.57)</b></div>
<b>
</b><br />
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Best remembered as the original artists behind Annie
Lennox’s ‘No More ‘I Love You’s’’ (her cover version was a No.2 hit in February
1995) this UK duo should be credited with releasing one of the most underrated
(and unheard) debut albums of the 80’s. This remix of the third single from the
album beefs up the synth bass-line and rhythm track, adding much needed
‘muscle’ to the, rather weedy by comparison, original album version.</div>
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<b>10 – Stephanie Mills – The Medicine Song (Original Mark
Berry 12” Mix) (Remixed by Mark Berry - 6.40)</b></div>
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Most famous for her international breakthrough hit, the
silky sweet ‘Never Knew Love Like This Before’ (No.4 in October 1980), the New
York born soul singer had subsequently failed to crack the UK singles chart
with any of her subsequent releases. By the time her 1984 ‘I’ve Got The Cure’
album was released, she had transformed into something altogether more
confident and edgy. Dressed in a stylised, sexy nurses’ uniform, she delivers
the sexually aggressive ‘Medicine Song’ lyric as a much more liberated, soul
diva. This Mark Berry 12” mix adds to the dynamic tension already present
within the song, ramping up the powerful synth stabs, rolling drum loops and
some seriously sexy vocal ad-libs...’Mama’s gonna give you some medicine...I
got the cure!’</div>
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<b>9 – Simple Minds – Speed Your Love To Me (12” Version)
(Remixed by Steve Lillywhite<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- 7.29)</b></div>
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In 1983/1984 Steve Lillywhite had fingers in a couple of
very profitable pies, as he nurtured a production monopoly over two of the UK’s
biggest International rock exports, U2 and Simple Minds. His work on U2’s ‘War’
had acted as the perfect template for the sonic landscape that Jim Kerr and the
Simple Minds camp had been hoping to map as they moved from ‘New Gold Dream 81
82 83 84’ to ‘Sparkle In The Rain’. ‘Speed Your Love To Me’ was the second
single released ahead of the album (following ‘Waterfront’ - which had just
matched the No.13 peak of their previous biggest hit, ‘Promised You A Miracle).
This Steve Lillywhite extended remix kicks off by elevating Kirsty MacColl’s
ethereal backing vocals to front and center of the track, adding breaks of
thunderous driving drums, clattering percussion and an air of thrilling
urgency, not to mention a ‘before it’s time’ chill out coda of whispering
guitar chords and backward drum loops.</div>
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<b>8 – Altered Images – I Could Be Happy (12” Dance Mix)
(Remixed by Martin Rushent - 5.39)</b></div>
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Following their breakout hit, ‘Happy Birthday’, this was
another Top 10 hit for the Scottish pop stars in December 1981. Produced by
Martin Rushent during the same period he was working with The Human League.
Here, he applies many of the same dub techniques he had so successfully
employed to extend and re-model the biggest hits from ‘Dare’. Rushent
transforms the track into a throbbing, joyous, rollercoaster ride of jangly
guitar riffs, chimes and cut-up vocal samples. The mix was so beloved by the
band that it was this version that appeared on the ‘Pinky Blue’ album instead
of the three minute radio mix.</div>
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<b>7 – Depeche Mode – Route 66 (Beatmasters Mix) (Remixed by
The Beatmasters - 6.20)</b></div>
<b>
</b><br />
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This track was the B-side to ‘Music For The Masses’ third
single ‘Behind The Wheel’. Chuck Berry’s rock ‘n’ roll classic may seem like a
curious choice of song to cover for the UK synth-pop pioneers, but as they
moved further into darker and, what would initially appear to be, less
commercial territory, they had something to prove. Like the album’s title, this
cover version was meant as an ironic, tongue in cheek, challenge to the
expectations of the bands very vocal critics and doubters. This was the sound
of a band having fun. Remixed by The Beatmasters (who were carving out a very
lucrative career for themselves, delivering hit 7” radio mixes for the likes of
The Shamen, Betty Boo and as artists in their own right). A driving guitar hook
(pun intended) pushes the track forward, punctuated with vocal snippets from
vintage US TV game shows all adding up to one of the quirkiest and unlikely
additions to the list.</div>
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<b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>6 - Frankie Goes To
Hollywood – Two Tribes (Carnage) (Mixed by Stephen Lipson - 7.54)</b></div>
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Repeating the No.1 success of ‘Relax, this epic second
single from ‘Welcome To The Pleasuredome’ would prolong its stay atop the UK
singles chart with the staggered release of several remixes, spread across
multiple 12” singles. While ‘Annihilation’ is considered by many as the
definitive ‘Two Tribes’ remix, I always preferred ‘Carnage’. This Stephen
Lipson mix takes Frankie back to where they belong – the dancefloor. Starting
with a ubiquitously epic, orchestral fanfare, it borrows the pumping bass line
from its predecessor and throws in a few samples of an orchestra falling down a
flight of stairs for added drama. Peppered with the ominous ‘This Is The Last
Voice You Will Ever Hear’ public announcements and the ‘My Name Is...’
introductions from the more laddish element of the band - this is Frankie,
simultaneously, at their most provocative and most playful. Well ‘ard!</div>
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<b>5 – Donna Summer – I Feel Love (Patrick Cowley Mega Mix)
(Remixed by Patrick Cowley - 15.45)</b></div>
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The original version of ‘I Feel Love’ would lay the
foundation on which was built the next thirty years of dance music (from Disco
to EDM and everything in-between). Giorgio Moroder’s pulsing bass and sequenced
synth lines would change the perception of synthesisers and all electronic
music in general. Prising it out of the cold white hands of the German boffins
(who were using it to make interesting noises on their pocket calculators) and
leading it out onto the world’s dancefloors, to be embraced by the clambering,
white-suited, masses. This Patrick Cowley ‘Mega-Mix’ was released a mere five
years after the original (in 1982), and stands as a 12” remix master-class to
rival the ‘Young Person’s Guide To The Twelve Inch’ mix of Frankie Goes To
Hollywood’s ‘Rage Hard’. At nearly sixteen minutes long, it’s by far the
longest track on my list. Throwing everything a modern recording studio has to
offer at it, the mix is bursting at the seams with sound-effects and crazy
synthesiser solos. Desperate to maintain the hypnotic groove of the original,
Cowley isn’t afraid to strip away the newly added layers, to leave the
solitary, mesmerising bassline, front and center on several occasions during its
extended running time. Disco Heaven!</div>
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<b>4 – The Associates – Club Country (12” Extended Version)
(Mixed by Mike Hedges & The Associates - 6.45)</b></div>
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Dundee acts as the unlikely backdrop for the birth of one of
the brightest, but tragically short lived, 80’s pop careers. After years of
experimental noodling and arty posing, Alan Rankin and Billy Mackenzie, had
finally started to break into the mainstream with ‘Party Fears Two’ in February
1982. The otherworldly euphoria and widescreen drama of that track was matched,
if not bettered, by its follow-up, ‘Club Country’, only a matter of months
later. From its extended, thundering drum intro, to the sweeping synth-strings,
all coated with layers of exquisitely unique vocals from Mackenzie, it’s a
master-class in alternative pop - 80’s style. They were never to trouble the UK
Top 20 singles chart again.</div>
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<b>3 – The Human League – The Sound Of The Crowd (12” Version)
(Remixed by Martin Rushent - 6.28)</b></div>
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It was make or break for The Human League in 1981. They had
signed to Virgin Records in 1979, but had failed to deliver any hits. When the
band imploded and split into two factions, it looked like it was all over.
Front-man Phil Oakey had other ideas, and began to formulate a masterplan to
become Sheffield’s answer to Abba. He met and recruited two teenage girls to
act as backing singer/dancers, whisked them away on a European tour and in the
process something miraculous happened (beside the non-involvement of Child
Services). Their first single as The Human League Mk.2 (‘Boys & Girls’)
failed to break the UK Top 40 and it’s rumoured that Virgin delivered an
ultimatum - ‘The next one makes the Top 10, or you’re dropped’. Well it didn’t
quite make it, ‘The Sound Of The Crowd’ reached No.12 in May 1981, but in just
over six months the band would have the UK Christmas No.1 and hit the No.1 spot
on the US Billboard Hot 100 with ‘Don’t You Want Me’. That song would bring
them their biggest UK and US success, while also delivering a bottomless
royalty-cheque retirement plan for Oakey / Callis / Adrian Wright, This Martin
Rushent remix set the tone for much of the bands early 80’s output. Built for
the dancefloor (it was colour coded as ‘Red’ to prove it), it’s a joyride of
warped synth melody lines, stuttering drum machines and ecstatic chanting
vocals.</div>
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<b>2 – Sister Sledge – Lost In Music (Special 1984 Nile Rodgers
Remix) (Remixed by Nile Rodgers - 6.37)</b></div>
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This may be considered cheating, as the original version of
the Philadelphia born siblings finest moment was released in August 1979, but
this remix and 12” release came during a second wave of interest for their,
Chic produced, ‘We Are Family’ album. Three of the four original singles from
the album were Top 40 hits again in 1984, with ‘Lost In Music’ being the
biggest, reaching No.4. This mix was completed during the same period that the
Chic boys were remixing ‘The Reflex’ for Duran Duran, hence the inclusion of
Simon Le Bon and Andy Taylor on backing vocals and the same use of cut-up
vocals and sampled ad-libs on the remix. ‘Melody is good to me’ indeed!</div>
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<b>1 – Soft Cell – Bedsitter (Extended Mix) (Mix by Mike Thorne
- 7.50)/ Facility Girls (Extended Mix) (Mix by Mike Thorne - 7.15)</b></div>
<b>
</b><br />
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Second on my list from Soft Cell, and my favourite 12” of
the 80’s. For me this was always a double ‘A’ side. The extended version of
‘Bedsitter’ (subtitled ‘Early Morning Dance Side’ on the back of the single)
paints an extra thick, even darker, smudge of eyeliner over the already sordid
tale of 24 hour party people living on the poverty line – dancing, drinking and
loving away their troubles. On the flip side ‘Facility Girls’ (subtitled ‘Late
Night Listening Side’) stretches the original two minute and twenty one seconds
running time into a seven minute epic tale of young lovers, struggling to stay
afloat as they face the pitfalls of their mundane jobs and the trials of
everyday life. Filled with more kitchen sink drama than your average Homebase.</div>
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Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-22808846961166725412013-08-12T06:00:00.001-07:002013-08-25T17:07:00.177-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>‘Only God
Forgives’ </b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">: the new fragrance by Nicolas Winding Refn</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The facts
are these: Ryan Gosling is a beautiful man. He has incredible integrity as an
actor. He possesses the same easy physicality that made Harrison Ford one of
the biggest movie stars of the 70’s and 80’s. A little bit of pee comes out
every time I let myself believe that the casting rumours about JJ Abrams’ ‘Star
Wars: Episode VII’ might be true. He has an understanding of technique and the acting
process that makes Daniel Day Lewis look like Dev from ‘Coronation Street’. I
have no doubt that one day he will do ‘full retard’ and bag himself the Oscar. If
I was Nicolas Winding Refn I too, would want to spend as much time with Ryan
Gosling as possible. I’d set up meetings to discuss our fantasy projects, I
would spend every waking hour making sure that Ryan got whatever Ryan wanted.
My year would look like this - three months scraping together the funding,
three months of shooting, three months editing it all together and another
three months promoting it around the world...just in time to head back to
Ryan’s pad in LA to start the whole process again...’it seems silly to have my
own place when there is so much room in your apartment Ryan’ I’d say. By my
calculation that leaves exactly no time at all, to actually write a decent
script and herein lies the problem. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">‘Only God Forgives’
is a relentlessly bleak and sordid revenge tale that, once it has grabbed hold,
drags you on a terrifying journey through the criminal underworld of Bangkok
and doesn’t let go until everyone is, literally, screaming for their mummy . It
has brutal sexual murders, prostitution, hard drugs, limb amputation and the
worst acupuncture session scene since Derek Jarman’s ‘St Sebastian’. What it doesn’t have is much of a script. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Don’t get me
wrong, there is some pretty terrific dialog in there – mostly delivered by Kristen
Scott Thomas’s Crystal - mother to Ryan Gosling’s character, Julian and his
wayward older brother, Billy. Here is a role that will inevitably bring heaps
of praise for Scott Thomas and will undoubtedly rank as one of her finest
creations. Crystal is ruthless. She will do anything to avenge the death of her
first born son, even if it means sacrificing his younger sibling. Her
relationship with her children is so impossibly twisted that she makes Rose
West look like Maria Von Trapp. If this
was ‘Sophie’s Choice’, Crystal wouldn’t choose either of her kids, she’d swap
them both for a nice leopard skin bra top and an upgrade to first class on the
way home instead. She’s Peggy Mitchell
channelling Bette Davis in ‘Whatever Happened to Baby Jane’, but with a better
wardrobe and a really potty mouth.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What Nicolas
Winding Refn has created is something truly spectacular and mesmerising to look
at – much like Mr Gosling himself – but it all adds up to little more than the
most bloody and brutal after shave commercial you’ve ever seen - ‘Only God
Forgives’ by Calvin Klein. </span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A real
acquired taste, and as such, I have a weird feeling that this perfume might
smell a bit like black pudding, with a faint after-note of disappointment.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 03/08/13</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-78522409138815439582013-08-12T05:57:00.002-07:002013-08-12T06:09:45.988-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<b><span style="line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">In praise of ‘Scandal’</span><span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<b><span style="line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></span></b></div>
<div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The revolution will be televised (and there’s a good chance it will be
wearing a power suit and fabulous shoes)<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I’m a huge
fan of ‘Scandal’ (Season two currently airing in the UK - 9pm Thursday on More 4).
It’s a glossy political thriller that is populated by a cast, so impossibly glamorous
and improbably quick witted, they make the regulars of Central Perk look like
The Munsters and sound like a remedial class at Byker Grove. Everyone featured
in the show is a lawyer, an expert in something that most of us have never even
heard off, or they work within the higher echelons of the US government – presumably
having graduated from the University of Abercrombie and Fitch with first class
honours in Fabulousness. Characters are prone to revealing their deepest (and
darkest) secrets as easily, and with the same relish, as we mere mortals would
squeeze an unsightly spot in front of the mirror in the privacy of our own
bathrooms. Their romantic clinches are of such a passionate and uncontrollable
nature, that their intimate moments resemble a ravenously hungry hyena bringing
down a straggling wildebeest and gorging on its face – so much so that you
could be forgiven for wondering where the David Attenborough commentary has
gone.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">While many
would assume that this means it shares more DNA with the high gloss, high camp and
high hem lines on display in the likes of ‘Dallas’, ‘Dynasty’ and ‘The Good Wife’
than the perceived high brow, high drama of ‘The West Wing’, ‘Homeland’ or ‘The
Wire’ (in the case of the later, everyone is just REALLY high!), such a
dismissive attitude is a serious disservice to the show. Last week’s episode
involved Olivia and her team of ‘Fixers’ exposing a government initiative
called ‘Thorngate’ – a classified computer programme that allows the FBI to spy
on every US citizen by (illegally)gaining access to their personal computers,
cell phones, webcams etc – Hello! Didn’t I just see something about that over
the shoulder of someone who wasn’t reading ‘Gone Girl’ and was actually reading
a newspaper on the tube? This type of ‘ripped from the headlines’ storyline is
pretty common practice for US shows such as ‘Law & Order’, but ‘Scandal’
manages to make such real life events seem outlandishly farfetched and raises the
personal stakes to deliriously overwrought heights. Personally, I think
‘Scandal’ has more in common with ‘24’ (the Kiefer Sutherland starring, race
against real-time, heightened reality, political thriller which is scheduled for
resurrection in 2014 after cancellation ended its initial run of eight seasons between
2001 and 2010). </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Like Jack
Bauer, Olivia Pope is a maverick who knows how to get the job done, even if it
means colouring in, outside the lines. Both are pretty confident that they know
everything they need to know, about everything they need to know – in his case it
invariably meant dismantling thermo nuclear warheads, planning escape routes
from terrorist infested bunkers and finding the most discrete ways to spend a
penny during those on-screen clock countdown moments, while in her case, it
usually involves endless ‘secret’ meetings, in inexplicably deserted wooded
areas of central Washington DC (estimated population: 630,000), with the most
famous man in the world, without anyone ever popping a word of it onto their
Facebook wall or splashing it all over the front page of the ‘National
Enquirer’ under the headline ‘P.O.T.U.S. pokes Pope’. Despite their maverick
status’ both feel the need to surround themselves with a team of experts, who chiefly
appear to be there to be proven wrong, by Olivia or Jack, at appropriately
‘there’s no turning back’ moments. Every situation that Bauer and Pope find
themselves in ends with the same hysterical levels of stress and panic usually
reserved for the hapless party planners who realise that they have double
booked the Royal baby christening for the same night, in the same venue, as the
annual ‘I Was A BBC TV Presenter In The Seventies’ reunion bash. Being a
misunderstood maverick also facilitates numerous opportunities to stare
longingly into the middle distance – in Jack’s case it invariably signalled
that he was remembering a particularly nasty bout of torture or the
administering of a coma inducing injection that not only left a nasty rash, but
resulted in a three week blank spot in his short term memory, while Olivia is contemplating
whether her years of sacrifice and self denial, the years studying the bar,
clawing her way to the top of a male dominated profession, only to have to give
it all up for a married man whom she could never hope to settle down with, were
all for nothing – she must be wondering if
she is going to spend so much time loitering in the parks and gardens of the
Capital, she probably would have been wiser to have just knocked off a quick City
and Guilds in landscape gardening and spent the rest of her College years partying
like those Disney Channel teen-queens in ‘Spring Breakers’.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The
universal truths that form the heart of both these shows are simple – every job
requires sacrifice, every relationship requires negotiation and, most
importantly, every hour of US television is actually only forty two minutes
long, so you had better speak really fast if you want to get all those plot twists
explained before the credits role. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Swap out ‘24’s
relentless ticking clock for ‘Scandal’s relentlessly ticking biological clock, Jack’s
killer instinct for Olivia’s killer heels or replace the ever present threat of
W.M.D. with the ever present threat of V.P.L. & you pretty much have the
same show. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Perhaps the
most interesting thing about ‘Scandal’ is something that sets it apart from
virtually every other US network show - truly ‘colour blind’ casting. The main
character is a complex, successful and financially independent, black woman,
the small regular cast is rounded out with another black actor, an openly gay
Cuban actor playing straight, a gay character who lives with his much younger
lover &, perhaps most shocking of all, one of the lead actresses is ginger.
Outside the science fiction and fantasy genres, shows such as ‘True Blood’ and
‘The Walking Dead, and away from cable channels such as HBO & Showtime, this
diversity and avoidance of racial and sexual stereo-typing is pretty
ground-breaking stuff, but the truly unique thing is that these facts are all
completely irrelevant to the character’s actions or motivations and have no
direct bearing on the plot, or character’s development within, the show. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">On the
surface, ‘Scandal’ may seem like yet another bit of glossy fluff, but scratch
the surface and there’s something far more interesting and revolutionary going
on, both on and off the screen. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 28/07/13</span></div>
</div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-80648701410747771152013-08-12T05:54:00.000-07:002013-08-12T06:10:11.039-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Up, Up &...Oh! Please Just Go Away...</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Mid-Term Movie Review 2013</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You may have
noticed that i've had too much time on my hands for most of this year & my
cinema attendance has gotten a little out of hand –I think it might be time for
the mid-term review...</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The six
months since January have brought us Super Heroes – a disappointingly hollow ‘Man
Of Steel’ (it felt like i’d spent an hour & a half transfixed by the promise
of a perfect specimen of Superman, only
for him to turn around at the last minute & reveal the skid marks on the
back of his little red panties) & a worthy Iron Man threequel (it dragged in the middle, I would have
re-cast that kid, but the finale sequences were a master-class in big budget
movie making) – Science Fiction - an ‘everything-I-could-possibly-have-wanted’
Star Trek movie (Khaaaaaaaaaan!), four separate
visits to see the visually stunning ‘Oblivion’ & one regrettable trip to
see the virtually stunted ‘After Earth’ – Music –the ‘I can’t believe that I’m
a grown man crying’ euphoria of ‘Good Vibrations’ & two films with The
Stone Roses as their main subject matter (‘Made Of Stone’ & ‘Spike Island’)
-Literary Adaptations - 3D F. Scott Fitzgerald (‘The Great Gatsby’) & ‘Life
Of Pi’, the flawed, but never less than fascinating ‘Cloud Atlas’ – Biographical – the Oscar worthy performances of Michael
Douglas & Matt Damon in ‘Behind The Candelabra’ & the most immersive
acting job i think i’ve ever seen from Daniel Day Lewis in ‘Lincoln’ (it’s just
a pity that the movie wasn’t quite as accomplished) – Zombies – one delivered with
a pulse (‘World War Z’) & one that arrived D.O.A. (‘Warm Bodies’) – Weather
- a Tsunami (‘The Impossible’) , a storm at sea (‘Life of Pi’), a twister (‘Oz
: The Great & Powerful’) & a bit of a wet weekend (Steve Coogan as Paul
Raymond in ‘The Look Of Love’) – All
Kinds Of Thrillers – Psychological : ‘Trance’, ‘Arbitrage’ & ‘The Purge’
- Pulpy : ‘Stoker’, ‘Side Effects’ &
‘Maniac’ – Pacey : ‘Welcome To The Punch’, ‘Jack Reacher’, ‘Olympus Has Fallen’
& ‘Dead Man Down’ & Just Plain
Bonkers : ‘The Paper Boy’, ‘Spring Breakers’ & ‘Django Unchained’. </span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With all
that going on, i’m more than a little surprised that an early contender for my film
of the year is ‘Before Midnight’, the third instalment of the long gestating
relationship saga that I didn’t even know I was waiting for. This is a movie with
no special effects, no ‘fast-cut’ editing or emotion prompting score. The takes
are long & filled with tightly scripted, but improvised sounding, dialog
& it has a main cast of just two actors (Julie Delpy & Ethan Hawke)
both in their early forties, neither of whom (with the greatest respect) would
described themselves as A-listers. Maybe It’s the throw-back to Woody Allen at
his wise-cracking, relationship analysing best (or maybe that should be a ‘throw-forward’
considering the photogenic locations that this movie shares with Allen’s recent
Euro-based output?). All I can say is that despite not particularly relating to
the characters circumstances or lifestyle, I cared about what happened to them,
I laughed (a lot) & the movie delivered my favourite line of dialog so far
this year – Celine is trying to express how difficult it had been raising the
couples young daughters alone, while Jesse was away on book tours or writing
breaks, resorting to walking the city streets at night with the girls in a
double pushchair, trying to lull them to sleep. She recalls an incident when a
man tried to attack her, but gave up because she looked ‘so pathetic’ - She
says ‘that’s the one good thing about being over 35, you don’t get raped so
much’. If only Amy Adams’ Lois Lane could
have been just as quippy - you believed that Margot Kidders’ was.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 28/06/13</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-47586272161155441192013-08-12T05:49:00.001-07:002013-08-12T06:10:23.802-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 15.75pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; tab-stops: 45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">How to avoid V.D. (‘Voice’
Decline) </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 15.75pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; tab-stops: 45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 15.75pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; tab-stops: 45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt;">
<b><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">or 6 easy steps to save ‘The Voice UK’...<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 15.75pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; tab-stops: 45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt;">
<br /></div>
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<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">Victory for Andrea Begley over Leah McFall on this year’s
‘The Voice UK’ makes the show seem even less relevant than it did last year,
when Adele tribute act Leanne Mitchell beat out, arguably edgier & more credible
acts, Tyler James & Bo Bruce for the title. Leanne thought she’d waved
goodbye to the beehive & fat suit, leaving the holiday camp stage behind,
but when her much delayed debut album was eventually released during the 2013
run of the show, it sold less than one thousand copies in its first week. Leah
seemed to have it in the bag – she was quirky, with a massive social network
& Twitter following & an undeniably commercial sound - she was the only
artist in this years’ line-up with a proven sales record - her tracks, released
via i tunes after the live shows, made enough of an impression to crack the
Official UK Singles Chart (she had two songs sitting comfortably in the Top 40
sales chart the day after the final result was announced). This problem is not
unique to ‘The Voice UK’, to varying
degrees, all the major UK TV talent shows are experiencing issues turning TV viewers
into voters & ultimately into music fans willing to spend money to support
the artists they have just created. This might not be too much of a problem for
the TV Channel or production companies, they are still getting the viewing
figures they need, but the associated Record Companies & music fans are
getting short shrift. The disconnect
between who is watching, who is voting & ultimately, who is buying, is now
so huge that it seems highly improbable that any music TV contest winner,
selected by a Saturday night TV audience who think their Granddaughters should
marry ‘real men like that lovely John Barrowman’ or struggle with the premise
of ‘Pointless’, will be the most creative, credible or even the most obviously
commercial contestant.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">Shock wins & unexpected exits are nothing new - during the early series’ of
X Factor there were huge ratings spikes for the finale episodes, which meant
the ultimate winner was chosen by phone voters who may only have seen that
nights performances. Hence in the 2005 second series, sibling duo Journey South
began dreaming of performing multiple sold-out shows at The Royal Albert Hall
after they topped the public vote following every live show, before ultimately
settling for a summer season at Blackpool after finishing in third place behind
Andy Abraham (the Singing Bin Man) & eventual series winner Shayne Ward. In
recent years early voting champs like Janet Devlin (last seen, I think, as Lady
Melisandre AKA The Red Priestess, giving birth to an evil smoke-monster-baby-thing
in ‘Game Of Thrones’) have lost support as the live shows progressed. The
biggest worry for X Factor producers must be the fact that One Direction, who
have gone on to become a global phenomenon, a $50 million industry, selling in
excess of eight million albums & fourteen million singles, could only
muster enough phone votes to come third behind Rebecca Ferguson & Matt
Cardle - neither of whom have experienced breakthroughs internationally &
have since struggled to maintain significant sales (or keep anyone awake) in
the UK.</span></div>
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">But these days, with catch-up TV, on demand & +1
viewing accounting for a huge proportion of overall ratings, it's no surprise
that the people who are actually picking up the phone to vote as the show airs
are not necessarily the downloading 'youth audience' needed to deliver track
sales, buy albums &, ultimately, create a viable, commercial artists with any
degree of longevity or credibility.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]-->
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With all its faults, I still think ‘The Voice UK’ is
worth a make-over. The chair-spin is still a compelling U.S.P. - who doesn’t
want to see Jessie J saddled with a full team of fatties & ugly stick
victims – the contestant styling & performance staging is decidedly more
‘tasteful’ & low-key compared with Brian Friedmans’ ridiculously OTT ‘Fraggle
Rock’ meets ‘San Francisco bath-house circa 1977’ X Factor production numbers
that would have Liberace saying ‘No Dahling! It’s just a bit too much!’ &
the over-all ‘positivity’ of the early rounds – no really rubbish singers, no mental
health refugees & the limited number of sob stories featuring (delete as
appropriate) death /death of pet / being a bit fat / lack of confidence due to
being a bit fat / unbearable aura of entitlement to fame & boundless riches
simply because it’s all you’ve ever dreamed of / our Nan – is very refreshing.
I am also a big fan of the odd washed-up 90’s Pop Star or West End ‘Legend’ rocking
up to ‘The Blinds’ & using it as a cheeky audition for the next series of
‘The Big Reunion’ or an understudy role in ‘Les Mis’.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
</div>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">Here are my top 6 suggestions to 'save' The Voice UK &
help it crown an artist who can sell some records (or at least facilitate the
soiling of a few pairs of teenage panties):<br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;">1
– Time for a complete over-haul of the public voting procedure – I have no beef
with the coaches part in the process – they can spin, not spin, knock-out,
battle & steal to their hearts content – but when the public gets involved,
they show needs a dramatic re-think. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Let Joe Public vote as
normal to get each of the coaches teams whittled down to the final four, but for
the finale, get rid of the public vote completely. In the same way that Girls
Aloud achieved ‘Popstars : The Rivals’ victory in 2002 via record sales & a
higher chart position than ‘got-this-thing-sewn-up-oh-sh*t-what-do-you-mean-they-have-actually-got-a-decent-song’
also-rans, One True Voice , each act
should release a track that they have performed during the finale, then spend a
week promoting it on daytime TV sofas, via social media & local radio
interviews. One week later they all return to the TV studio for a bit of ‘event’
telly built around the chart reveal. Who-ever gets the highest placing on that
weekends chart, wins the show, gets the record deal etc. This enforces the
notion that they are creating an artist who is relevant enough to build a fan
base & can sell ‘records’. It worked for Girls Aloud – it was so engrained
that people even bought ‘Can’t Speak French’ & ‘Whole Lotta History’.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2 - What's with the mad dash to the finale? –
This year the live shows were over in three weeks - meaning we had only heard
our chosen winner singing solo six times! Are we really expected to care, &
more importantly, shell out our cash, for singers we have only heard singing
enough songs to fill one side of their debut LP? (For anyone under 25 I'll
double back & explain all these weird terms like 'side', 'LP' & paying
for music)<br />
Can't we slow down the eliminations...as Oscar Wilde once said 'losing one
contestant per week is unfortunate, losing four in one week is just so much
less expense for the BBC'.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Extend the series run &
slow down the elimination process - shows featuring one or, at a push, two of
the coaches’ entire teams would gives us the opportunity to find out more about
the contestants, what they are capable of &, unlike this year, give us a
fighting chance to actually remember their names. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3 - Get rid of the ‘is-it–on-or-is-it-not-on’
results show once & for all – several US reality shows like ‘Dancing With
The Stars’ & ‘So You Think You Can Dance’ have done just that & are
thriving as a result - keep those voting
lines open for longer & let the catch-up / on demand viewers in on the
voting action – then give out the results of the vote at the start of the next
weeks show – nothing is more entertaining than watching crest-fallen wannabes
all dressed up with nowhere to go. If the BBC feel they need to fill a certain
quota of transmission hours devoted to ‘The Voice’, I would whole-heartedly back
the introduction of a mid-week support show (maybe hosted by Claudia Winkleman)
similar to the ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ daily camp-fest ‘It Takes Two’ – another
chance for us to dig a bit deeper, find out more about the singers, watch the
rehearsal process & see Jessie J struggling to keep up the facade that she
gives a sh*t. May I suggest ‘Deep Throat with Claudia’ as a title...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">4 – No more duos or groups in
the Blind Auditions – X Factor invariably struggles to find enough ‘real’
groups to herd together & push through to slaughter at the live shows. They
are inevitably forced to Frankenstein their own, using the tried & tested
‘Louis Walsh – Build Your Own Boy Band’ manual (a cute one, one with big lady
hair, a slightly off-white one, a tattooed bad boy, oh! & one that can sing)
&‘Britain’s Got Talent’ is now having to draft in acts from all over the
EU. Send these auditionees to Dermot or Ant & Dec - they need them more
than Holly & Reggie do. To be honest I still haven’t recovered from that
pair last year who looked like a Fleetwood Mac tribute act – but one where Mick
Fleetwood & Stevie Nicks had eaten all the other members of the band...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">5 – Remember the three S’s -
song choice, song choice, song choice – Arguably the most frustrating thing for music fans is the over reliance on a
seemingly ever decreasing library of songs – Sarah McLachlan’s ‘Angel’ again!
Really Danny! The best you could come up with? – As some notable exceptions
have triumphantly proved – Matt Cardle singing Biffy Clyro, James Arthur
resurrects a ‘lost’ Shontelle track – people are willing to accept edgier &
unexpected selections. A good friend of mine swears that the secret of singing
contest success is male contestants singing women’s songs & vice-versa. It worked for Dana International...sort of.</span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">6 – Make those coaches work a
little harder for their money – I’m not a huge fan of any of the coaches, but I
would like to see them get up on stage a few more times, either with their
chosen few, or as a ‘Hot Mess’ super-group – watching Sir Tom bellowing &
getting his stately groove on through the coaches version of Daft Punk’s ‘Get
Lucky’ was one of the TV highlights of 2013 so far...</span></span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 27/06/13</span></span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-79543312450617587382013-08-12T05:45:00.000-07:002013-08-12T06:10:40.068-07:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Tegan & Sara – Pool To Be Kind</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">During
the numerous outpourings of love, gratitude & humility that occurred during
the Tegan & Sara concert at Troxy last night i became convinced that these
were two very nice, well brought up young ladies. Now, I do realise that things
might be different when the pound coins they’ve placed on the pool table get
ignored & someone pushes in on their session, but on last nights’ evidence
i’d be surprised...</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 12/06/13</span></span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-33840999078631039752013-08-12T05:41:00.003-07:002013-08-12T06:10:52.160-07:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Johnny Marr , Don’t Give Up The Day Job!</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Watching
Johnny Marr performing ‘How Soon Is Now’ on ‘Later...with Jools Holland’ last
week was more disturbing than the opening episode of French
‘back-from-the-dead’ supernatural thriller ‘The Returned’</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not
particularly because Johnny, like the focus character from the enigmatic set-up
episode, looked like he may have spent the last four years dragging himself
from the wreckage of a rather nasty bus crash, no, it was more the deafening,
unholy sound of The Smiths near perfect legacy spinning in it’s grave.</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have no
problem with the singers from, now defunct, bands performing their erstwhile
outfits greatest hits – i never really understood Paul McCartney taking nearly
fifteen years to embrace his Beatles past in his live sets – but for the same
reasons that i wouldn’t want to see Morrissey ‘wielding his axe’ on the ‘Guitar
Moods of The Smiths’ live tour, Benny & Bjorn singing ‘The Winner Takes It
All’, or the drummer from Genesis pitching up to the centre stage &...oh,
wait a minute, that one’s not such a bad idea after all...anyway, Johnny Marr is an amazing guitarist & if
he was aiming for the Pierce Brosnan in
‘Mama Mia’ vibe, it was a huge success, otherwise he should stick to performing
tracks from his debut solo album, ‘No-one Should Have To Listen To This’, or
whatever it’s called. Criminally vulgar
indeed...</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written 10/06/13</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834412164983649850.post-36427624074852403592013-08-12T05:33:00.002-07:002013-08-12T06:11:08.227-07:00<h2>
<b><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;">‘It’s A Nice Day For A Red Wedding’ </span></span></span></b></h2>
<h2>
<b><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">or ‘Why I
believe Alexis Carrington deserves a seat on the Iron Throne’</span></span></b></h2>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For those of you who haven’t seen it, or don’t bother to watch serialised television
in it’s natural habitat i.e. serialised on television, this week’s ‘Game Of
Thrones’ was an incredible high point in, what can only be described as, an over-achieving,
‘raising the bar’ Season 3.</span></div>
</div>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The episode was called ‘The Rains Of Castamere’, but those
au fait with the George R R Martin source material (of which i am not) have
been giggling & whispering smugly about it behind our backs since the show
launched a couple of years ago, referring to it knowingly as ‘The Red Wedding’.
Not because the centre piece of the
wedding banquet was a mountain of delicious (& bang on-trend) red velvet
cup-cakes or the bridesmaids were decked out, in a
vision of slutty inappropriateness, in matching scarlet puff-sleeved big fat gypsy
wedding dresses, no, it is known as ‘The Red Wedding’ because virtually all the
guests end up lying in pools of their own blood after spraying fountains of
‘the red stuff’ from massive gapping slits in their throats.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now this rang some very loud (wedding) bells with me & i
was whisked back in time to another TV union that ended in death, destruction
&, more importantly, higher viewing figures.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Like ‘Game of Thrones’, ‘Dynasty’ was at the top of it’s
game when ‘The Moldavian Massacre’ aired as the climax to it’s Season 5 finale
in 1986 Both shows feature feuding
families, power struggles & a pair of old dragons (come on! Joan was
already pushing 70 back then). Although
the settings couldn’t be more different, ‘Game Of Thrones’ blood bath
unravelled in the dingy cellar of some re-claimed National Trust Heritage site,
while the union of Prince Michael of Moldavia & Amanda Bedford (Alexis
& Blake’s secret love-child no less!) took place in a sun-drenched LA
studio back-lot given a Euro-makeover by hanging up a few strings of onions
& drafting in every out of work actor in Hollywood, who looked ‘a bit foreign’, to sit on the grooms side or act as waiting
staff. In both cases, what unfolded
condemned a pair of exotic beauties with ‘just stepped out of the salon’,
‘because we’re worth it’ hair, to their respective fates, motionless & left
for dead as the end titles rolled. In the case of ‘Game Of Thrones’ Talisa of
Valantis (main character Robb Starks’ pregnant bride played by Oona Chaplin), her
time under the dryer was over, while Michael Praed lived to blow wave another
day as ‘Dynasty’s’ Prince Michael of
Moldavia. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now i seem to have veered off topic a little, but here are
the main lessons to be learned when attending a future ‘Game of Thrones’
wedding (or similar social gathering):</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1 - if one of the guests turns up wearing chain mail armour
under their best clobber, the first dance isn’t likely to be ‘Lady In Red’ by
Chris De Burgh (although that does seem strangely appropriate in this case),
it’s more likely to be something a bit scary by Slayer of Cradle of Filth.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2 – PDA’s (Public Displays of Affection) are ill advised –
especially if the person your snogging is not one of the daughters of the host
whom you vowed to marry a couple of years earlier.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3 - Never eat the salt & bread snacks laid on at a
paying bar –it may be customary & a traditional sign of allegiance, but
they are really only trying to get you to drink more. Besides, i’m never
convinced that a ‘now wash your hands’ sign in the gents is enough at this kind
of buffet event.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">4 – if you look over & someone from Coldplay is in the
wedding band, it’s time to leave – but that might just be a good rule of thumb
for any social event.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It’s in circumstances like these & with shows like this,
that i see the real value, & pleasure, in watching TV, on TV, once a
week. The build-up, the ritual of ‘Event
TV’ & then seven days to recover from the WTF just happened! Binge-watching box-sets & streaming
multiple episodes of TV shows is all well & good, but it feels a bit like
stashing two tubes of Pringles & a bag of M&M’s in your bedroom, rather
than sitting down & having a proper meal.
Some things are worth savouring & sometimes a little bit of
anticipation is as much a part of the eventual pleasure. Oh! by
the way, good luck avoiding spoilers all
you Box-Setters (& those who have moral objections to watching Sky TV or
illegal downloads), only eight months ‘til the ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 3 DVD
box-set gets released!</span></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Originally written - 05/06/13</span></div>
Channel Clutterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14041308276093619192noreply@blogger.com0